If necessity is the mother of invention, then… Frustration is the father of masturbation!
Always marry a woman with small palms. It makes your dick look bigger !
I believe in safe sex...I've got a handrail around the bed.
Just remember: No matter how hot & sexy a babe is, someone somewhere is tired of fucking her!
The difference between sex and death is that, with death, you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.
Life without Friends is like Boobs without Nipples... POINTLESS !
Go braless: it'll pull the wrinkles out of your face.
The importance of UNITY explained at it's best: What did one leg of a woman tell the other: UNITED we are saved, Divided we are Fucked.
Old Proverb: A smile is a curve that makes everything straight.
New Proverb: Boobs are curves that make Something super straight...!
Slogan on a boy's T-shirt: Please tell your boobs not to stare at my eyes.
Fuck a girl ; she'll love you... Love a girl; she'll fuck you!
All those who proclaim that dog is man's best friend, have evidently not played with a pussy.
The irony of a blow job is that even if you have her at your feet she's got you by the balls.
Some Wacky Mature Quotes
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