Michael Jackson dies in LA hospital

LOS ANGELES – Michael Jackson, the sensationally gifted "King of Pop" who emerged from childhood superstardom to become the entertainment world's most influential singer and dancer before his life and career deteriorated in a freakish series of scandals, died Thursday, a person with knowledge of the situation told The Associated Press. He was 50.

The person said Jackson died in a Los Angeles hospital. The person was not authorized to speak publicly and requested anonymity.

The circumstances of his death were not immediately clear. Jackson was not breathing when Los Angeles Fire Department paramedics responded to a call at his Los Angeles home about 12:30 p.m., Capt. Steve Ruda told the Los Angeles Times. The paramedics performed CPR and took him to UCLA Medical Center, Ruda told the newspaper.

Jackson's death brought a tragic end to a long, bizarre, sometimes farcical decline from his peak in the 1980s, when he was popular music's premier all-around performer, a uniter of black and white music who shattered the race barrier on MTV, dominated the charts and dazzled even more on stage.

His 1982 album "Thriller" — which included the blockbuster hits "Beat It," "Billie Jean" and "Thriller" — remains the biggest-selling album of all time, with more than 26 million copies.

He was perhaps the most exciting performer of his generation, known for his feverish, crotch-grabbing dance moves, his high-pitched voice punctuated with squeals and titters. His single sequined glove and tight, military-style jacket were trademarks second only to his ever-changing, surgically altered appearance.

As years went by, he became an increasingly freakish figure. His skin became lighter and his nose narrower. He surrounded himself with children at his Neverland ranch, often wore a germ mask while traveling and kept a pet chimpanzee named Bubbles as one of his closest companions.

In 2005, he was cleared of charges he molested a 13-year-old cancer survivor at Neverland in 2003. He had been accused of plying the boy with alcohol and groping him. The case took a fearsome toll on his career and image, and he fell into serious financial trouble.

You are what you eat

By Poon Chian Hui

Think twice before you reach for that can of fizzy drink. It is not just about your waistline. Think about the lines on your face too. That is because carbonated drinks can age you, nutritionists say.

Other well-loved foods like pastries, potato chips, sausages, coffee, red meat, white rice and bread can also cause premature ageing. The reason? Most of these foods are high in fat or sugar, which are not healthy for the body, said Ms Magdalin Cheong, chief dietitian and senior manager of Dietetic and Food Services at Changi General Hospital.

Foods that age us include:

Carbonated drinks which are high in sugar and have no nutrients. They have 'empty calories', said Ms Teo Kiok Seng, a nutritionist at Nutrition Network Services.

'The sugar in these drinks can lead to obesity, which increases your risk of hypertension, diabetes, heart disease and stroke,' she said.

A nutritional study by the Harvard School of Public Health found that a can of carbonated drink a day can cause one to pile on 7kg in a year.

Sausages can increase the risk of colorectal cancer, a recent European study found, Ms Teo added.

The culprits are the carcinogenic N-nitroso compounds, which are formed when nitrite preservatives are added to processed meat, she said.

Ms Jaclyn Reutens, a dietitian at Aptima Nutrition & Sports Consultants, added that sausages are usually made with fatty meat.

Chemicals and additives are also added so a person's liver has to do more work to detoxify them. 'As we age, our organs do not work as efficiently so some people may get into trouble,' said Ms Reutens.

Coffee has caffeine. What most people may not know is that caffeine makes stress hormones shoot up and stay at an abnormally high level for hours after consumption.

'One of the biggest contributors to premature ageing is the powerful stress hormone called cortisol,' said Ms Teo. 'High levels of cortisol wear down the muscles, leading to muscle wasting.' Excessive caffeine is also dehydrating, said Ms Reutens.

Potato chips and fries are deep fried at high temperatures, giving rise to the formation of trans-fat.

Diets high in trans-fat are linked to an increased risk of coronary heart disease, said Ms Teo. 'However, if palm oil is used, no trans-fat will be produced,' she added.

Sugary pastries contain a lot of sugar, which can lead to obesity. What is worse is that pastries are often made with hydrogenated oils, which contain trans-fat.

Hydrogenated oils are made by adding hydrogen to liquid oils to turn them into solids for easier storage. However, this chemical process produces trans-fat. An example would be margarine.

Trans-fat increases the risk of heart disease more than saturated fat does, said Ms Teo, as it lowers good cholesterol and increases bad cholesterol in the bloodstream.

In addition, the combination of sugar and trans-fat is bad news for our liver and pancreas, said

Ms Reutens. 'It's dangerous to overwork our organs as it means we are more exposed to free radicals.'

Free radicals are unstable particles caused by chemical reactions in the body. Antioxidants are needed to fight them, she added. 'If our intake of anti-ageing foods is insufficient to combat free radicals, we age faster and have a higher risk of diseases.'

Red meat has protein, which is essential for tissue repair, but too much animal protein may cause calcium loss from bones. This increases the risk of osteoporosis, said Ms Teo.

Studies have shown that a high protein intake in middle-aged adults is linked to inflammatory polyarthritis, where inflammation occurs in more than one joint.

White rice and white bread have very little fibre, making them 'high glycemic index' foods.

'Such foods are digested and absorbed into the bloodstream very quickly, causing a sudden spike in blood sugar level,' said Ms Teo.

This can lead to cell changes that accelerate ageing and increase the risk of chronic diseases, she added. These include Type 2 diabetes, gall bladder and heart diseases, Alzheimer's disease and certain types of cancers.

Other high glycemic index foods include mashed potatoes, processed grains and sugary cereals.

FOODS THAT KEEP YOU YOUNG

Keeping youthful the natural way is not all that difficult - you just have to eat the right foods. Anti-ageing foods like berries and fish contain powerful ingredients that can help keep you in the pink of health from inside out.

Foods that keep us young include:

Green tea. It boasts catechins - potent antioxidants that have been shown to prevent cancer, said Ms Jaclyn Reutens, a dietitian at Aptima Nutrition & Sports Consultants.

In addition, Ms Teo Kiok Seng, a nutritionist with Nutrition Network Services, said that a recent report in the European Journal Of Neuroscience suggested that regular consumption of green tea may reduce the risk of age-related degenerative brain disorders, such as Alzheimer's disease.

However, not all forms of green tea carry the same health benefits.

'Green tea packaged in tea bags have gone through numerous processes that may have destroyed its goodness,' said Ms Reutens.

It is best to drink loose leaf green tea, she said.

Tomatoes contain lycopene, which helps to reduce wrinkles and fine lines, said Ms Reutens. This is because lycopene hinders the skin's ageing process.

It does this by preventing damage to the DNA in mitochondria, found in cells and which are crucial to cellular growth.

Tomatoes also contain vitamin C, which acts as an antioxidant, helping to strengthen collagen fibres, said Ms Magdalin Cheong, chief dietitian and senior manager of Dietetic and Food Services at Changi General Hospital.

Collagen is a protein essential to healthy skin.

Nuts and seeds are great sources of vitamin E and omega-6 fatty acids, said Ms Reutens.

'These two compounds work hand in hand to keep skin elastic and to reduce the signs of ageing,' she said.

That is because vitamin E is an antioxidant, said Ms Cheong.

Antioxidants mop up free radicals - the main cause of skin ageing.

A study published in the American Journal Of Clinical Nutrition in 2005 found that eating almonds together with heart-friendly foods like soya products can significantly reduce cholesterol levels, said Ms Teo.

Yogurt contains calcium, which helps maintain strong bones, and probiotics which prevent bowel diseases.

'As we age, our bones lose calcium,' said Ms Reutens. 'Calcium is therefore needed in our diet to prevent osteoporosis.'

Osteoporosis is a condition where bones become weak and break easily.

On average, a 150g portion of yogurt contains 220mg of calcium. This amount makes up 30 per cent of our daily recommended intake of 800mg, said Ms Reutens.

Probiotics are bacteria that help improve the balance of good and bad bacteria in the digestive system.

'As we age, this balance needs more effort to be restored. Eating yogurt gives it a boost,' she said.

People who are lactose intolerant can eat yogurt too, as the lactose would have already been broken down by the bacteria, said Ms Teo.

Salmon and other oily fish contain heart-friendly omega-3 fatty acids, said Ms Cheong.

Ms Reutens recommends eating these at least twice a week.

'As you age, your arteries may get increasingly clogged, resulting in heart disease,' she said. 'Omega-3 fatty acids reduce the amount of fats in the bloodstream, hence preventing excessive blood clotting.'

Berries come in red, pink, blue, purple and other assorted colours. The pigments determine the types of antioxidants found in them, said Ms Reutens.

A recent antioxidant analysis by the United States Department of Agriculture showed that blueberries, blackberries, cranberries, strawberries and raspberries top the list of 20 foods with the highest levels of antioxidants, said Ms Teo.

In general, the antioxidants in berries help to reduce the likelihood of eye-related diseases, such as cataracts and age-related macular degeneration, said Ms Reutens.

Because different types of berries carry different combinations of antioxidants, we should not limit our diet to one or two kinds.

'Try to eat a wide variety,' said Ms Reutens. 'Mix them with cereal or enjoy them as a snack or dessert.'

Olive oil is rich in monounsaturated fats, which promote a healthy cholesterol level.

It is also good for the heart, thanks to its anti-inflammatory effects that prevent heart diseases. For instance, it strengthens blood vessel walls, thus lowering the risk of internal bleeding.

However, too much olive oil is not recommended due to its caloric content, said Ms Reutens.

What these terms mean

Additive

A substance added to foods to improve colour, texture, flavour or shelf life. It can be natural (salt and sugar) or synthetic (artificial sugars, preservatives, colouring and MSG).

Some synthetic additives are said to be harmful to health.

Antioxidant

A substance that inhibits oxidation, protecting cells from damage by free radicals. Examples are catechins found in green tea, lycopene in tomatoes, and vitamins C and E.

Carcinogen

A substance that causes cancer by turning normal cells into cancer cells. It is believed that nitrites, when added to meat during processing such as when sausages are made, may result in the formation of carcinogenic compounds.

Collagen

A fibrous protein that is a major component in connective tissues like skin, ligaments and tendons.

Glycemic index

An indicator of the impact of foods on blood glucose levels.

Foods with low glycemic index, like vegetables, have carbohydrates that are digested more slowly.

High glycemic index foods, like white bread, have carbohydrates that are broken down into sugars more quickly. This causes a spike in blood glucose levels, which is unhealthy.

Monounsaturated fat

A healthy unsaturated fat found in plants or plant-based foods. It is said to be able to reduce the risk of heart disease. Found in foods like olive oil, avocados and nuts.

Omega-3 fatty acids

Unsaturated fatty acids. Usually found in fish and nuts, they help to lower cholesterol levels to protect the body against heart diseases.

Probiotics

A class of beneficial bacteria that aids digestion, promotes "good" bacteria and reduces "bad" bacteria in the digestive system. Can be found in yogurt.

45 lessons life taught me

Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio.

To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me.
It is the most requested column I've ever written.
My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain..
25 No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'
27 Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

A great testimony from Lee Kuan Yew on age-ing - keep going!

'Stay interested in the world, take on a challenge':
Singapore Minister Mentor Lee Kuan Yew

This is Minister Mentor Lee Kuan Yew's advice on ageing the best way one can. Yesterday, he shared some personal insights into how he himself deals with ageing. Here is the transcript of his remarks.

MY CONCERN today is, what is it I can tell you which can add to your knowledge about ageing and what ageing societies can do. You know more about this subject than I do. A lot of it is out in the media, Internet and books. So I thought the best way would be to take a personal standpoint and tell you how I approach this question of ageing.

If I cast my mind back, I can see turning points in my physical and mental health. You know, when you're young, I didn't bother, I assumed good health was God-given and would always be there. When I was about '57 that was - I was about 34, we were competing in elections, and I was really fond of drinking beer and smoking.

And after the election campaign, in Victoria Memorial Hall - we had won the election, the City Council election - I couldn't thank the voters because I had lost my voice. I'd been smoking furiously. I'd taken a packet of 10 to deceive myself, but I'd run through the packet just sitting on the stage, watching the crowd, getting the feeling, the mood before I speak. In other words, there were three speeches a night. Three speeches a night, 30 cigarettes, a lot of beer after that, and the voice was gone.

I remember I had a case in Kuching, Sarawak. So I took the flight and I felt awful. I had to make up my mind whether I was going to be an effective campaigner and a lawyer, in which case I cannot destroy my voice, and I can't go on. So I stopped smoking. It was a tremendous deprivation because I was addicted to it.

And I used to wake up dreaming...the nightmare was I resumed smoking. But I made a choice and said, if I continue this, I will not be able to do my job. I didn't know anything about cancer of the throat or esophagus or the lungs, etc. But it turned out it had many other deleterious effects.

Strangely enough after that, I became very allergic, hyper-allergic to smoking, so much so that I would plead with my Cabinet ministers not to smoke in the Cabinet room. You want to smoke, please go out, because I am allergic.

Then one day I was at the home of my colleague, Mr. Rajaratnam, meeting foreign correspondents including some from the London Times and they took a picture of me and I had a big belly like that (puts his hands in front of his belly), a beer belly. I felt no, no, this will not do.

So I started playing more golf, hit hundreds of balls on the practice tee. But this didn't go down. There was only one way it could go down: consume less, burn up more.

Another turning point came when -this was 1976, after the general election - I was feeling tired. I was breathing deeply at the Istana, on the lawns. My daughter, who at that time just graduating as a doctor, said: 'What are you trying to do?' I said: 'I feel an effort to breathe in more oxygen.' She said: 'Don't play golf. Run. Aerobics.'

So she gave me a book, quite a famous book and, then, very current in America on how you score aerobic points swimming, running, whatever it is, cycling. I looked at it skeptically. I wasn't very keen on running. I was keen on golf. So I said, 'Let's try'.

So in-between golf shots while playing on my own, sometimes nine holes at the Istana, I would try and walk fast between shots. Then I began to run between shots. And I felt better. After a while, I said: 'Okay, after my golf, I run.' And after a few years, I said: 'Golf takes so long. The running takes 15 minutes. Let's cut out the golf and let's run.'

I think the most important thing in ageing is you got to understand yourself. And the knowledge now is all there. When I was growing up, the knowledge wasn't there. I had to get the knowledge from friends, from doctors.

But perhaps the most important bit of knowledge that the doctor gave me was one day, when I said: 'Look, I'm feeling slower and sluggish.' So he gave me a medical encyclopedia and he turned the pages to ageing. I read it up and it was illuminating. A lot of it was difficult jargon but I just skimmed through to get the gist of it.

As you grow, you reach 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25 and then, thereafter, you are on a gradual slope down physically. Mentally, you carry on and on and on until I don't know what age, but mathematicians will tell you that they know their best output is when they're in their 20s and 30s when your mental energy is powerful and you haven't lost many neurons. That's what they tell me.

So, as you acquire more knowledge, you then craft a programme for yourself to maximise what you have. It's just common sense. I never planned to live till 85 or 84. I just didn't think about it. I said: 'Well, my mother died when she was 74, she had a stroke. My father died when he was 94.'

But I saw him, and he lived a long life, well, maybe it was his DNA. But more than that, he swam every day and he kept himself busy. He was working for the Shell company. He was in charge, he was a superintendent of an oil depot. When he retired, he started becoming a salesman. So people used to tell me: 'Your father is selling watches at BP de Silva.'

My father was then living with me. But it kept him busy. He had that routine: He meets people, he sells watches, he buys and sells all kinds of semi-precious stones, he circulates coins. And he keeps going. But at 87, 88, he fell, going down the steps from his room to
the dining room, broke his arm, three months incapacitated. Thereafter, he couldn't go back to swimming.

Then he became wheelchair-bound. Then it became a problem because my house was constructed that way. So my brother - who's a doctor and had a flat (one-level) house - took him in. And he lived on till 94. But towards the end, he had gradual loss of mental powers.

So my calculations, I'm somewhere between 74 and 94. And I've reached the halfway point now. But have I?

Well, 1996 when I was 73, I was cycling and I felt tightening on the neck. Oh, I must retire today. So I stopped. Next day, I returned to the bicycle. After five minutes it became worse.

So I said, no, no, this is something serious, it's got to do with the blood vessels. Rung up my doctor, who said, 'Come tomorrow'. Went tomorrow, he checked me, and said: 'Come back tomorrow for an angiogram.' I said: 'What's that?' He said: 'We'll pump something in and we'll see whether the coronary arteries are cleared or blocked.'

I was going to go home. But an MP who was a cardiologist happened to be around, so he came in and said: 'What are you doing here?' I said: 'I've got this.' He said: 'Don't go home. You stay here tonight. I've sent patients home and they never came back. Just stay here. They'll put you on the monitor. They'll watch your heart. And if anything, an emergency arises, they will take you straight to the theatre. You go home. You've got no such monitor. You may never come back.'

So I stayed there. Pumped in the dye, yes it was blocked, the left circumflex, not the critical, lead one. So that's lucky for me.

Two weeks later, I was walking around,I felt it's coming back. Yes it has come back, it had occluded. So this time they said: 'We'll put in a stent.' I'm one of the first few in Singapore to have the stent, so it was a brand new operation. Fortunately, the man who invented the stent was out here selling his stent. He was from San Jose, La Jolla something or the other. So my doctor got hold of him and he supervised the operation. He said put the stent in. My doctor did the operation, he just watched it all and then that's that. That was before all these problems about lining the stent to make sure that it doesn't
occlude and create a disturbance.

So at each stage, I learnt something more about myself and I stored that. I said: 'Oh, this is now a danger point.' So all right, cut out fats, change diet, went to see a specialist in Boston, Massachusetts General Hospital. He said: 'Take statins.' I said: 'What's that?' He
said: '(They) help to reduce your cholesterol. ' My doctors were concerned. They said: 'You don't need it. Your cholesterol levels are okay.' Two years later, more medical evidence came out. So the doctors said: 'Take statins.'

Had there been no angioplasty, had I not known that something was up and I cycled on, I might have gone at 74 like my mother. So I missed that deadline. So next deadline: my father's fall at 87.

I'm very careful now because sometimes when I turn around too fast, I feel as if I'm going to get off balance. So my daughter, a neurologist, she took me to the NNI, there's this nerve conduction test, put electrodes here and there.

The transmission of the messages between the feet and the brain has slowed down. So all the exercise, everything, effort put in, I'm fit, I swim, I cycle. But I can't prevent this losing of conductivity of the nerves and this transmission. So just go slow. So when I climb up the steps, I have no problem. When I go down the steps, I need to be sure that I've got something I can hang on to, just in case. So it's a constant process of adjustment.

But I think the most important single lesson I learnt in life was that if you isolate yourself, you're done for. The human being is a social animal - he needs stimuli, he needs to meet people, to catch up with the world. I don't much like travel but I travel very frequently despite the jet lag, because I get to meet people of great interest to me, who
will help me in my work as chairman of our GIC. So I know, I'm on several boards of banks, international advisory boards of banks, of oil companies and so on.

And I meet them and I get to understand what's happening in the world, what has changed since I was here one month ago, one year ago. I go to India, I go to China.

And that stimulus brings me to the world of today. I'm not living in the world, when I was active, more active 20, 30 years ago. So I tell my wife. She woke up late today. I said: 'Never mind, you come along by 12 o'clock. I go first.'

If you sit back - because part of the ending part of the encyclopaedia which I read was very depressing - as you get old, you withdraw from everything and then all you will have is your bedroom and the photographs and the furniture that you know, and that's your world. So if you've got to go to hospital, the doctor advises you to bring some photographs so that you'll know you're not lost in a different world that this is like your bedroom.

I'm determined that I will not, as long as I can, to be reduced, to have my horizons closed on me like that. It is the stimuli, it is the constant interaction with people across the world that keeps me aware and alive to what's going on and what we can do to adjust to this different world.

In other words, you must have an interest in life. If you believe that at 55, you're retiring, you're going to read books, play golf and drink wine, then I think you're done for. So statistically they will show you that all the people who retire and lead sedentary lives,
the pensioners die off very quickly.
So we now have a social problem with medical sciences, new procedures, new drugs, many more people are going to live long lives. If the mindset is that when I reach retirement age 62, I'm old, I can't work anymore, I don't have to work, I just sit back, now is the time I'll enjoy life, I think you're making the biggest mistake of your life.

After one month, or after two months, even if you go travelling with nothing to do, with no purpose in life, you will just degrade, you'll go to seed.

The human being needs a challenge, and my advice to every person in Singapore and elsewhere: Keep yourself interested, have a challenge.

If you're not interested in the world and the world is not interested in you, the biggest punishment a man can receive is total isolation in a dungeon, black and complete withdrawal of all stimuli, that's real torture.

So when I read that people believe, Singaporeans say: 'Oh, 62 I'm retiring.' I say to them: 'You really want to die quickly?' If you want to see sunrise tomorrow or sunset, you must have a reason, you must have the stimuli to keep going.'

This story was first published on Jan 12, 2008.

Treatment For Sugar (Diabetic) - Thank God for Lady Finger or "OKRA"

Please note that another name for Lady Finger (Bhindi ) is " OKRA ".

Last month in one of TV program I learnt of a treatment of Sugar (Diabetes). Since I am diabetic, I tried it and it was very useful and my Sugar is in control now. In fact I have already reduced my medicine.

Take two pieces of Lady Finger (Bhindi) and remove/cut both ends of each piece. Also put a small cut in the middle and put these two pieces in glass of water. Cover the glass and keep it at room temperature during night. Early morning, before breakfast simply remove two pieces of lady finger (bhindi) from the glass and drink that water.

Keep doing it on daily basis.

Within two weeks, you will see remarkable results in reduction of your SUGAR.

My sister has got rid of her diabetes. She was on Insulin for a few years, but after taking the lady fingers every morning for a few months, she has stopped Insulin but continues to take the lady fingers every day. But she chops the lady fingers into fine pieces in the night, adds
the water and drinks it all up the next morning.
Please. try it as it will not do you any harm even if it does not do much good to you, but U have to keep taking it for a few months before U see results, as most cases might be chronic.

Most Lethal Driving Mistakes

From not buckling up to not getting enough shut-eye, here's a rundown of the 10 most common mistakes motorists make.

By Claire Martin

Woman Applying Makeup While Driving

The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration estimates that 37,313 people were killed in motor vehicle traffic crashes in 2008. If that isn't a reason to become a better driver, then we don't know what is.
In an ideal world, drivers would execute every road maneuver with precision and ease. Sadly, we do not live in a never-never land, and not everyone walks away from metal-to-metal mayhem. Truth is that drivers are not created equal. Some are too brash, others too conservative. Some are even downright clueless. The common thread is that they can all turn a pleasant day on the motorway into a surreal nightmare in the blink of an eye.
And don't just blame it on "them." Everyone is guilty of making common driving mistakes that can endanger us all. Think about it: We'll bet you can recall with vivid exasperation a whole litany of stupid moves you've made throughout the years — some benign, some not so much.
To help you stay safe behind the wheel, here's a list of 10 driving behaviors to avoid.
Swerving
The No. 1 fatal mistake made by drivers is perhaps the most simple: not staying in their own lane — i.e., running off the road or drifting into the adjacent lane. According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, in 2007, 15,574 people died in crashes where the driver simply couldn't stay in the lane.
Driving While Drowsy
"Driving a vehicle when you are fatigued is as dangerous as driving while impaired by alcohol or drugs," National Transportation Safety Board Acting Chairman Mark V. Rosenker said after a fatal highway accident in 2003 in which a college student who had been awake for the previous 18 hours was driving a carload of fellow students at 5 a.m. According to the NHTSA, in 2007 fatigued driving caused the deaths of 1,404 people, and more traffic fatalities occurred during the hours when most people are accustomed to being asleep (3 a.m. to 6 a.m.) than at any other time of day.
Drinking and Driving
Every 40 minutes someone dies in a drunk-driving accident. (In all 50 states, a blood-alcohol level of 0.08 percent or more is considered illegal, but a little-known fact is that you can be charged with driving while impaired even if you're under the legal limit.) Young drivers are particularly prone to drinking and driving: The 21- to 34-year-old set is responsible for well over half of alcohol-infused fatal crashes. Not surprisingly, the decision to get behind the wheel while intoxicated is made most often at night and on the weekends. According to the NHTSA, 60 percent of drivers who died after dark in 2007 were legally drunk. Alcohol is also a factor in half of pedestrian traffic deaths — both drivers and pedestrians are the culprits.
Overcorrecting
You get panicky when the wheels of your SUV hit the rumble patch on the shoulder of the highway, so you throw the steering wheel in the opposite direction to get the vehicle back on the road. This is a classic example of overcorrecting or oversteering, and it's a particularly perilous maneuver when you're behind the wheel of an SUV driving on the highway at high speeds. Consider it a rollover waiting to happen. More than 4 percent of automobile fatalities a year occur because of drivers overcorrecting.
Speeding
Racing, driving faster than the posted speed limit or simply going too fast for road conditions — i.e., speeding — comprises the second highest cause of death in fatal crashes, according to the NHTSA. Once you hit 55 mph, you're in the danger zone: 30 percent of fatalities occur at 55 or above. The worst-case scenarios invariably involve speeding without wearing a seat belt or a motorcycle helmet. Fatality rates for speeding motorcyclists are shockingly high: In 2007, speeding was a factor in 36 percent of motorcycle fatalities. Of those, 41 percent of drivers and more than half of passengers were not wearing helmets (only 20 states and the District of Columbia require helmets).
Failure to Yield Right of Way
For drivers age 70 and above, failing to yield while merging into traffic is the top cause of crashes. In a recent study by the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety, drivers 80 and older simply fail to see the other vehicle they should be yielding to. Drivers 70 to 79 see the vehicle but misjudge whether they have time to proceed ahead of it. Failure to yield right of way was the fifth leading cause of fatal crashes in 2007.
Erratic or Reckless Driving
At its mildest, we're talking about weaving and tailgating; at its most severe, this kind of driving involves steering down the wrong side of the road, exceeding the speed limit by 20 mph or doing more than 80 mph, and worse. Reckless driving can bring fines, jail time — and death. More than 1,850 fatalities in 2007 were the result of erratic or reckless drivers.
Running Red Lights
A whopping 75 percent of automobile crashes occur in cities, according to the nonprofit Insurance Research Council. The most common cause of these accidents? Hitting the gas when the light turns red. Of the myriad types of collisions that can result, head-on and side-impact collisions are the most dangerous. NHTSA statistics show that of the 41,059 automobile fatalities in 2007, 54 percent occurred in cars that sustained frontal damage. When you cut it too close while running a light, your front end or another car's front end is impacted. Either way, it's a recipe for a deadly accident.
Not Wearing a Seat Belt
Despite the fact that seat belt use is far more prevalent than even a decade ago — not to mention being legally required — 33 percent of people who die in vehicle fatalities failed to buckle up. Without a seat belt, car drivers and passengers put themselves at risk of being ejected from a vehicle, and 76 percent of the time the ejection ends in death.
Inattentive Driving
Eating, talking on a cell phone, typing text messages and fumbling with the car stereo all fall under the umbrella of inattentive driving, which was responsible for 4,704 deaths in 2007. Of these bad habits, cell phone use behind the wheel is becoming standard practice, with an estimated 1 million Americans driving and talking on the phone at any given time. With that comes a four-fold increase in the risk of crashing. One example, which caused the NTSB to launch an inquiry, involved an SUV that veered off the left side of the road, jumped the median, flipped and landed on top of a vehicle driving the opposite direction. The driver was trying to negotiate high crosswinds while talking on a handheld phone. Surprisingly, using a hands-free device likely wouldn't have made a difference. "You'd think using a hands-free phone would be less distracting, " said Anne McCartt, author of a study published in the British Medical Journal. "But we found that either phone type increased the risk."

Retired Proctor and Gamble official sends an open letter to President Obama

An Open Letter To President Obama
By Lou Pritchett

Dear President Obama:

You are the thirteenth President under whom I have lived and unlike any of the others, you truly scare me.

You scare me because after months of exposure, I know nothing about you.

You scare me because I do not know how you paid for your expensive Ivy League education and your upscale lifestyle and housing with no visible signs of support.

You scare me because you did not spend the formative years of youth growing up in America and culturally you are not an American.

You scare me because you have never run a company or met a payroll.

You scare me because you have never had military experience, thus don't understand it at its core.

You scare me because you lack humility and 'class', always blaming others.

You scare me because for over half your life you have aligned yourself with radical extremists who hate America and you refuse to publicly denounce these radicals who wish to see America fail.

You scare me because you are a cheerleader for the 'blame America' crowd and deliver this message abroad.

You scare me because you want to change America to a European style country where the government sector dominates instead of the private sector.

You scare me because you want to replace our health care system with a government controlled one.

You scare me because you prefer 'wind mills' to responsibly capitalizing on our own vast oil, coal and shale reserves.

You scare me because you want to kill the American capitalist goose that lays the golden egg which provides the highest standard of living in the world.

You scare me because you have begun to use 'extortion' tactics against certain banks and corporations.

You scare me because your own political party shrinks from challenging you on your wild and irresponsible spending proposals.

You scare me because you will not openly listen to or even consider opposing points of view from intelligent people.

You scare me because you falsely believe that you are both omnipotent and omniscient.

You scare me because the media gives you a free pass on everything you do.

You scare me because you demonize and want to silence the Limbaughs, Hannitys, O'Relllys and Becks who offer opposing, conservative points of view.

You scare me because you prefer controlling over governing.

Finally, you scare me because if you serve a second term I will probably not feel safe in writing a similar letter in 8 years.

Lou Pritchett


Note: Lou Pritchett is a former vice president of Procter & Gamble whose career at that company spanned 36 years before his retirement in 1989, and he is the author of the 1995 business book, Stop Paddling & Start Rocking the Boat.

Mr. Pritchett confirmed that he was indeed the author of the much-circulated "open letter." “I did write the 'you scare me' letter. I sent it to the NY Times but they never acknowledged or published it. However, it hit the internet and according to the ‘experts’ has had over 500,000 hits.

Managing Your Money-Related Stress

Women are worried. Very, very worried. About their stock investments, balloon mortgage payments, job security. Men are, of course, worried too, but economic stress could be taking a greater health toll on women, according to this survey of more than 2,500 people released yesterday by the American Psychological Association. (My colleague Liz Wolgemuth tells you why in this blog.) The survey found that 80 percent of folks say the economy is a significant source of stress, up from 66 percent in April. Women, though, were more likely to report being stressed about money—83 percent of them compared with 78 percent of men. Female baby boomers (ages 44 to 62) and seniors (63 and over) were most likely to report being worried over the economy, I'm guessing because they need to draw from those investments and retirement funds to send the kids to college and to live on.

Unfortunately, stress is taking a toll on our health. This survey of 104 women from BettyConfidential.com found that half of the respondents are experiencing a general sense of fear and concern, while nearly 1 in 5 is suffering insomnia. One survey taker said: "I don't sleep more than four hours a night. I get headaches. I worry that my kids can't go to college, and my doctor now has me on antianxiety meds. (Thankfully, they are cheap!)"

Worry for the sake of worrying, when we don't take meaningful action, gets us nothing but migraines, neck pain, tummy troubles, and an ill-functioning immune system incapable of fending off colds and other infections. So, once you've established a financial game plan for riding out this crisis, it's time to get proactive about putting aside those worries. The American Psychological Association recommends the following:

Tune in, but don't submerge yourself. You obviously can't stick your head in the sand and avoid all newspapers and evening news reports. But you shouldn't be checking the stock markets every 10 minutes throughout the day. OK, I'm a bit guilty of this, but I've vowed to limit myself to two times a day, max.

Recognize how you deal with money-related stress. Are you eating more? Imbibing too much? Have you taken up smoking or gambling? Sometimes, just having the self-awareness is all you need to put down the beer or bag of chips. If you need help in finding more healthful ways to deal with stress, consider talking to a professional.

See hardship as an opportunity for growth or change. As Dickens wrote in A Tale of Two Cities, "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times." Maybe that teaching job will give you more joy in the long run than hedge-fund trading. Or perhaps this is a great time to volunteer for that Peace Corps mission that you were always putting off. Tara Parker Pope points out in this New York Times piece that kids may be healthier in leaner economic times just by having their parents around more.

Use stress as an excuse to exercise. OK, this is my own tip, but exercise is a fabulous stress reliever in addition to all its other health benefits. Taking a brisk walk outside—who can resist in this gorgeous fall weather?—will reduce stress hormone levels and take your mind off falling stock prices. It will also ramp up your energy and help you sleep better at night. Check out this piece I wrote for other ways to make stress work for you

Money Harmony: How Relationships Can Survive a Bad Economy

By Kerry Hannon

Couples bicker more about money than practically anything else. No surprise, then, that when money is tight, the battles can really heat up. U.S. News asked Olivia Mellan, a psychotherapist and couples communication expert specializing in money issues and stress management in turbulent times, how couples can best weather a financial downturn—or any money-related standoff. Mellan, of Washington, D.C., is the author of Money Harmony: Resolving Money Conflicts in Your Life and Relationships (Walker & Co., $14.95). Edited excerpts:

Why is money such a cause of discord?
Money is tied up with our deepest emotional needs: for power, security, independence, control, and self-worth. But since so many of us are unaware of that emotional load, we fight about it without understanding what the battles are about. Most fights begin with a disagreement about financial strategy: One partner may tend to save and worry while the other might spend extravagantly. Other polar opposites include planners and dreamers, risk takers married to risk avoiders, and money monks—who think money is dirty—married to money amassers, who think he who dies with the most wins. Importantly, different communication styles can lead to hurt, misunderstanding, and chronic conflict. Women feel patronized or lectured at. Men feel criticized, unaccepted.

How can a down economy make matters worse?
One of the most difficult things we face, both alone and as couples, is to have to downsize our goals or put them off. And when money is tight, people become anxious and revert even more strongly to type: Hoarders will save more passionately. Spenders will spend more passionately.

How to ward off a skirmish?
Share with each other your feelings of loss, disappointment, and panic. Discuss what you can do together to modify your goals. That way, even if one partner is the money manager, the other isn't put in the child position.

One system that seems to work is to negotiate agreements in regular, structured money talks. Find a relaxed time to have your weekly or monthly discussion—not when you're tired or distracted by the kids, or when you're paying bills and money is a hot-button issue. Begin by expressing a feeling: "I'm worried about our retirement accounts shrinking so drastically. And when you spent money on the new flat-screen television, it made me very anxious. Can we find another place to cut down, or return the TV until finances are less tight?" It's vital that each person share his or her vulnerabilities about money to level the playing field.

Write down your own short-, mid-, and long-term goals and have your partner do the same. Prioritize them, then talk about how you can merge them or support each other's mission.

Are there fewer clashes when couples keep some of their money separate?
Typically, yes. The issue of merging money is where a lot of the problems start. It's usually the man who wants to merge the money, and the woman who wants separate money. Men will think, "Are you planning to divorce me?" or "You don't trust me." Women will say, "You must want to control me." I firmly believe all women need some separate money. I advise couples to keep some money separate so they can do things they want without having to discuss it.

Any tips on how to keep the conversation cool and calm?
Talk about your feelings rather than focusing on your partner's behavior. Minimize blame. When challenged yourself, be sure to say, "I'm sorry I did that. I'll try to do better next time," instead of lapsing into defensive explanations. Look at the positive qualities of your partner. Hoarders, for instance, might admire a spender's ability to give and enjoy life. Spenders might admire hoarders' ability to set limits, plan, budget priorities. Listen. Observe the no-interruption rule.

What's your favorite assignment for couples?
Play one another for a day. If you worry about her overshopping, go out and buy some new clothes for yourself. By practicing the nonhabitual, you develop muscles you don't use. The goal is to reach more balance, not to become the other person. It is absolutely transformational.

Aging Skin Doesn't Have to Be Wrinkled

One cream that really works: a good sunscreen
By Lindsay Lyon

While birthday cakes may gain a candle every year, the appearance of dreaded crow's feet and creases, luckily, isn't so inexorable. To some extent, simple steps can prevent wrinkles from forming. And even when those time-wrought lines start to appear, it's in our power to contain the damage.

By far, the most fundamental component of wrinkle prevention is sun protection, since sun exposure, compounded by other environmental insults, accounts for the vast majority of wrinkles. The rest are caused by uncontrollable factors such as genes and years of repetitive muscle movements, says David J. Leffell, a professor of dermatology and surgery at the Yale School of Medicine and author of Total Skin.

While prevention of sun damage ideally begins in childhood, it's never too late to start safeguarding skin, to retard further harm, he says. With time, rays break down collagen and elastin tissue, which keep skin supple and pliant. While the body can replenish some of what's lost, its repair mechanisms do falter over time. "By the late teens, early 20s, if you aren't careful, you're going to have damage outstripping any repair that the body can do," says Leffell.

Sun care is simple: Use sunscreen or a sun-protective moisturizer year-round—even in winter, he says. A minimum of SPF 30 is ideal, as is a product that contains zinc oxide or Parsol 1789, which protect against UVA radiation. (SPF reflects only UVB protection.)

Other dermatologists also recommend topical antioxidants, like vitamins C and E, thought to neutralize damage to DNA triggered by the UVA rays. Studies of such skin products have won over Arielle Kauvar, a New York-based dermatologist, though she cautions that certain agents, like vitamin C, have to be formulated in a very specific way—i.e., sealed in a light-tight container—to work. Leffell, however, isn't convinced that the evidence supports antioxidant topicals.

Evidence does support another kind of topical—prescription creams containing retinoic acid, more commonly called tretinoin, which can actually rejuvenate skin, as University of Michigan researchers reported in the Archives of Dermatology last May. Retinoic acid works by gradually stimulating fresh collagen production, which helps stave off or reverse fine lines, says Leffell. "There's no point at which you lose a benefit from starting [its] application," says Kauvar, who frequently prescribes retinoic acid to patients in their 50s and 60s, just as she pre-emptively does for the younger set. Just one potential wrinkle: If used during pregnancy, it may cause birth defects.

Cancer and Age: Why We May Face a Tradeoff Between Cancer Risk and Aging

By Katherine Hobson

It's long been clear that cancer is a disease of aging. While children and younger adults are of course afflicted by certain types of the disease, the vast majority of cases occur in people over 50. But from that simple observation, researchers are just beginning to tease out the intricate connections between the biological processes driving both the disease and the aging process. Though the research is in early days, they're discovering how the two may be linked, and even how the forces of evolution may have produced a tradeoff: the ability to protect against cancer at the expense of a faster aging.

Judith Campisi, a research scientist at the Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory and the Buck Institute for Age Research, sees the relationship two ways. First, she says, the same forces that damage our genes likely drive both cancer and aging. For example, oxidative stress, a type of DNA damage caused by free radicals and other molecules, has been associated with both processes, says Steven Austad, a biologist at the Barshop Institute for Longevity and Aging Studies at the University of Texas Health Science Center. (Austad is also deputy director of research at the American Federation for Aging Research, which funds studies on aging and age-related diseases.) Any biological processes that protect against oxidative stress and other forms of DNA damage are "unequivocal good guys," says Campisi. "They protect against cancer, protect the genome, and protect longevity."

But there's a second, more complex way to view the relationship between aging and cancer. The working hypothesis, explains Campisi, is that "cancer was a problem that evolution had to solve very early on, when an organism evolved the ability to regenerate and repair tissue." Cancer is characterized by cells dividing wildly, with no brakes; if a cell can't divide, it can't become cancerous. One solution that evolved: a whole class of naturally occurring tumor suppressor molecules that can disable cells in danger of going haywire. They do it either by telling the cell to kill itself, through a process called apoptosis, or by simply turning off the potentially dangerous cell's ability to divide, a process called senescence. That process, Campisi says, helps hold off cancer in our reproductive years.

But there's a tradeoff. The problem is that those senescent cells, while they have lost their ability to divide out of control, may trigger inflammation in nearby cells and tissues, and inflammation is linked with a host of age-related disease, including late-life cancers. Experiments in mice show that goosing one important tumor suppressor gene, p53, so it's a little bit activated all the time, does certainly hold off cancer ... but the mice age prematurely. It has been possible to regulate the action of p53 in a kind of Goldilocks mode—not too much, not too little—and that produces mice that are both tumor-free and don't age prematurely, says Campisi. While it sounds great, "that's easy to do in mice, but difficult to do in people," she says. Some other possible tactics include figuring out why the senescent cells are secreting molecules that promote the dangerous inflammation and whether suppressing that secretion would help. Or, she says, maybe there's a way to get rid of the senescent cells entirely.

Another frontier of research involving both aging and cancer: telomeres, the lassolike piece of DNA that protects the end of a chromosome. Over time, as a cell divides, its telomeres get shorter and shorter until each is too short to form a lasso loop. The cell then enters senescence, explains Jack Griffith, a professor of microbiology and immunology at the Lineberger Cancer Center of the University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill. An enzyme called telomerase restores these fraying ends in egg and sperm cells—as well as in most cancer cells. So, why not knock out telomerase in the body in order to fight cancer? Well, about 15 percent of tumors don't depend on telomerase—they use other methods to keep their DNA ends from fraying. And blocking telomerase could mean other cancers switch to that route, too. So there's no easy, universal fix.

Research into the complex of cancer and aging is far from finding a solution to either. But what scientists are learning points to the idea that these kinds of tradeoffs and conundrums are everywhere, says Austad. A remedy for one problem may aggravate the other, which illustrates the need to communicate about tackling both problems. "There's a lot more talk than there used to be between cancer and aging researchers," he says. "But there should be more."

5 Common Myths About Aging

If you age well, you shouldn't have to worry about becoming frail and senile
By Deborah Kotz

Think aging is all about losing your memory and becoming hard of hearing? Think again. Many people sail through the aging process without walkers or pacemakers. In fact, researchers now believe it's those age-related diseases—diabetes, heart disease, cancer, stroke, osteoporosis, Alzheimer's—that leave us frail or disabled, rather than the normal aging of our bodies. Consider this: The vast majority of those who live to be 100 are able to live independently on their own well into their 90's, and about 15 percent of them have no age-related diseases even after they hit the century mark, according to the New England Centenarian Study. Here are some other common myths about aging.

1. Losing those few extra pounds will extend your life. Once you hit 75, carrying a little extra weight can be protective. The Baltimore Longitudinal Study of Aging, a 50-year ongoing study involving 3,000 seniors, has shown that older folks who have a body mass index of 27—about 154 pounds for a 5-foot-4 woman—live longer than everyone else, including those with a "healthy" BMI in the range of 19 to 25. It could be that the body needs a little extra fat to provide sufficient energy to the immune system when it's, say, fighting off a flu infection, explains Luigi Ferrucci, who heads the BLSA study, conducted at the National Institute on Aging. He emphasizes, though, that obese individuals who have a BMI above 30 should still work with their doctors to get their weight down.

2. You 'll need a hearing aid. Granted, some hearing loss is quite common with age; as part of the normal aging process, sensory cells within the ear begin to die off. Still, only 35 percent of 80-year-olds actually need a hearing aid, and some folks in their 90s still have perfect hearing. Here's how to guard against hearing loss.

3. You're bound to get crotchety and withdrawn. The BLSA study found that our personalities don't change much after age 30. So, if you're cheerful and gregarious in your 40s, you can expect to be the same in your 80s. Marked personality changes some seniors experience are due not to normal aging but to some related disease like dementia or stroke.

4. Senility is inevitable. Sure, you may forget a word or someone's name here or there, but the senile stereotype of an old person—remember Mr. Magoo?—is a thing of the past. While nearly everyone experiences a certain amount of decline in cognitive abilities as they age, most of us don't have an actual impairment in memory that severely interferes with our ability to live independently well into old age. The unlucky ones who do usually have a memory-robbing disease like Alzheimer's. "I once interviewed a 104-year-old man from Sardinia for a study I was conducting," recalls Ferrucci. "We first spoke on the phone so I could let him know I was coming to see him. When I arrived two hours later, he had composed a poem about me, the man from Tuscany, [incorporating] various details from our previous conversation."

5. You won't have the energy to exercise well in your 80s. Ninety is the new 70. Evidence now suggests that people who take up exercise later in life—say, at age 70—experience improved heart function by lowering their resting heart rate and increasing their heart mass and the amount of blood pumped with each beat. The BLSA study even found a reduction in heart attacks among older men who took up a high-intensity activity like swimming or running. Older exercisers also experience less shortness of breath and fatigue. Here's how to keep up your strength.

How to Get Yourself ‘Infected’ with Happiness

Every time you get a cold or stomach flu, you probably look around to see which friend, coworker, or family member you can blame. Well, now take a look around and see whom you should thank for your happiness. Turns out, happiness may be infectious, a contagion (if you will) that you can spread or receive just by being in close proximity to other people, according to a study published in this week's British Medical Journal.

Of course, that invites the question: How can you get yourself infected? The researchers say surrounding yourself with happy friends, relatives, and neighbors is a start. The study even found that having friends of friends who were happy increases your chances of being similarly cheerful.

While joy may indeed be contagious, I do wonder—as do critics of the studywhether upbeat folks tend to gravitate toward like-minded buddies and whether they also share the same peppy genes with family members. This would explain why happiness tends to cluster in certain social circles.

Still, I'm happy (no pun intended) to take the researchers' advice and make every effort to connect with positive people. Unfortunately, my job and parenting responsibilities leave me little time for evening phone chats or morning coffee with friends. Thus, I often feel, well, out of touch.

But it just so happens that I joined the social networking site Facebook last week, mainly because many of my journalist colleagues were already on it. I didn't quite know what it was about, but I've certainly enjoyed the hourly updates on what my friends are making for dinner or watching on TV. While the researchers found that having a happy friend or family member living within a mile of me increases my chances of being happy by 25 percent, I wonder if having happy friends and relatives a keystroke away also gives me a boost?

My biggest burst of Facebook happiness came from the surprise E-mails from high school friends whom I haven't spoken to in 20 years. What a pleasure to see their spouses and babies and learn what career paths they'd chosen. One of my old friends wrote me that she was "happy just to see my face." While nostalgia has contributed to my mood boost, I also believe that having this electronic network of happy friends plays a role. (Research hasn't yet confirmed this, and the current study looked at people from 1971 to 2003, before social networking sites took off.) So, what's my personal proof? After looking at a friend's posted photos of all the happy faces at the 20th high school reunion that I recently missed, I went to bed feeling downright euphoric.

Some Thoughts on Happiness and Middle Age

Driving home from work the other night, I was heartened to see that gas prices had dipped below $3 a gallon. Then I thought, What am I so happy about? When I first started commuting 13 years ago, the price hovered at around $1.10.

This led me to wonder what it is about the human psyche that enables us to so dramatically adjust our perspectives over time. For instance, I get a little thrill when I see the number on the scale dip a few pounds, yet the weight I'm now satisfied with would have mortified me in my 20s. On the flip side, if someone told my college graduate self that I'd be where I am professionally today, I would have been ecstatic beyond my wildest dreams. While I'm certainly satisfied with my job, I'm now focused on what it demands: improving my reporting skills, getting the scoop, and covering a story from a unique angle.

Does this sort of changed thinking make me a happier person or less satisfied? I'm not sure, but my personal reflections happened to coincide with a new study out this week that offers some insights. It shows that the young and the old in the United States and 71 other countries have a greater sense of well-being than do middle-agers; American women reach their peak level of unhappiness when they're 38 years old —which gives me a year until I hit rock bottom. (Men land at their lowest point at age 53.)

The researchers don't really know how to explain the U-shaped curve but speculate that it could be explained by adjustments we make to our expectations over time. Happiness when we're young, they say, may be due to outsize hopes and ambitions. "People start out their lives thinking they can conquer their own particular Everest," says study coauthor Andrew Oswald, a professor of economics at the University of Warwick in Great Britain. In middle age, we dial back our dreams and arrive at a more realistic assessment of our potential. That can be pretty depressing. By the time we hit our twilight years, though, we've reached a sort of peace with ourselves. We might also better appreciate the blessings of life itself after seeing loved ones and close friends pass away.

For middle-aged women in particular, expectation adjustment may include giving up the Superwoman myth and accepting that real women with jobs and kids can't have it all. Something has to give, whether it's the work or the family or the health. (I write this as I work from my home computer, hacking away from a severe cold, my son lying nearby with a stomach virus.) "American women have particularly high aspirations for professional life as well as their family life, which is great but makes incredible demands on their time," says Oswald. This could explain why happiness levels have decreased for white American women over the past 30 years as more moms hit the workforce, whereas they've remained the same for white men. (Black men and women have experienced an increase in happiness, but their levels are still below those of whites.)

Is there anything women can learn from this study to make themselves a little happier? "There's no magic solution that we have for avoiding the midlife dip," Oswald informs me. "But perhaps knowing about its existence might help some people realize that it's quite normal to have a bad patch." And that things should get better again with age.

Want to Be Happier? Here's How

A new book offers some tools designed to raise your happiness "set point"
By Lindsay Lyon

Is lasting happiness attainable or a pipe dream? For the past 18 years, University of California-Riverside professor of psychology Sonja Lyubomirsky has studied this question, and what she reports might even sway pessimists. In an interview with U.S. News, she says that it's quite possible to stretch the limits of our pre-programmed temperaments. And in a new book in stores this month, The How of Happiness: A Scientific Approach to Getting the Life you Want, she demonstrates how to do it—without medication. (Find out where you stand on her Subjective Happiness Scale.) Interview excerpts:

Why are some people happier than others?
About 50 percent of the answer lies in genetics. We're born with a genetically determined happiness "set point," meaning that even though our happiness will seesaw following pleasing or traumatic life events, it will inevitably shift back to a natural level. Life circumstances, such as where we live, whether we're married, whether we're physically attractive, whether we're wealthy, or healthy, have very little bearing on our well-being—only 10 percent—because human beings adapt very quickly to situations. Someone who feels elated after upgrading to a big house is likely to soon start yearning for more—an extra bedroom, a pool, whatever it may be. But ultimately, whether we drive a battered truck or a Lexus to work; whether we have hypertension or asthma, our ability to be happy and get happier doesn't vary much.

But people predisposed to unhappiness aren't doomed to stay that way?
Hardly. The remaining portion of our happiness—40 percent—is within our control. And we do so by changing how we think and behave. It's like weight. My "set point" for weight is higher than I'd like, but I exercise and eat well daily to ensure I stay below that level. I know that if I slacked off, however, my weight would surge back up. The same is true for happiness. We can boost our happiness above our preset level, but keeping it there requires consistent effort. Ideally, that effort will become habit, and as with exercise, it will become less of a chore with time. Those prone to unhappiness aren't doomed; they'll just have to try harder to counteract the forces working against them.

That sounds like work.
It is work, but it isn't necessarily unpleasant work. And the payoff is worth it. Being happy brings with it many benefits. By reviewing 225 studies, I've found that happy people on the whole are healthier, they live longer, they're more productive at their jobs, they earn more money, they're more helpful, they have better relationships, they have stronger social support networks, and they cope better than unhappy people do.

In your book, you detail 12 scientifically tested activities people can use to increase their level of happiness. Can you give a few examples?
Not everyone should do all 12 of these things. [You can find out which activity suits you best by taking Lyubomirsky's Person-Activity Fit Diagnostic.] But each is an example of how we can change our thoughts and actions to maximize our happiness. First, we must identify which of these activities suits us best. People often fail at boosting happiness because they choose strategies that don't fit with their strengths and lifestyles. And the trick is to keep doing them. For some people, it's expressing gratitude that works. They write down three to five things they're grateful for once a week, which helps them avoid taking things for granted. The moment we start taking things for granted—whether it be our husbands or our health—those things stop making us happy. Other people might benefit most from distraction. Rumination is a huge barrier for happiness. My studies have shown that people who ruminate aren't gaining insight; they're just making themselves unhappier. The most effective way to escape its seductive stranglehold is to distract with absorbing activities. Go on a run. Meet a friend for lunch. Some people pluck rubber bands on their wrists; the jolt of pain signals stop each time they ruminate.

Is it ever too late?
No. The "set point" doesn't become more entrenched over time. Habits might, but research has shown us that habits can be changed. People who smoke all their lives are able to quit. There's no reason this should be any different.

Why do the methods you describe work?
They're creating little bursts of enthusiastic feelings. And really, the key to having lasting happiness is having frequent positive emotions. It's unfortunate that so many people poo-poo feelings on the basis that they're transient. Even though they're transient, they're perhaps the most important factor in getting that 40 percent of happiness under our control.

Are you happy?
I'm up there, but I don't live enough in the present. I have what we call "future nostalgia." I'll be sitting on the couch with my young kids, thinking that they're wonderful. But then I can't stop myself from thinking about how they're going to change; they'll be getting older soon. So, I'm already expecting to be nostalgic for that moment, rather than savoring it. Like anyone else, sometimes I need to heed my own advice.

What Fuels Romantic Attraction?

As Washington's famed cherry blossoms give way to tulips and forsythia, spring's fertility gets me thinking about love. (French novelist Gustave Flaubert once said, "Love is a springtime plant that perfumes everything with its hope, even the ruins to which it clings.")

What is it, I wonder, that drives us to fall head over heels for that special someone? I decide to pose this question to Rutgers University anthropologist Helen Fisher, who analyzed the brain scans of people experiencing the insane rush of new love and wrote one my favorite books, Why We Love. (The brain scans showed that the caudate nucleus—the part of the brain associated with pleasure, arousal, and motivation to acquire rewards—gets activated when a person gazes at a photo of a sweetheart.)

Fisher answers my question with a question: "You can walk into a room with all good-looking people, where everyone has the same cultural and educational background, and yet you're only drawn to one person. Why is that? I'm beginning to think that maybe there are some biological things we should be looking at." In fact, Fisher's next book, a study of attraction due out next February, will share insights she gleaned from more than 100,000 matches made on the dating website chemistry.com, for which she serves as a scientific adviser. She posted an online survey there to try to classify people by types and see whether attraction could be predicted based on those types. (She found it can.) Working title of the book? "I don't have one yet," she says. Perhaps, I muse, Why We Feel That Connection.

The survey and book are based on Fisher's theory that four biological types attract or repel each other based on which hormone is dominant and drives them:

Explorer : Creative, curious, thrill-seeker type who is driven to get a surge in the "excitement" hormone dopamine.

Builder : Managerial type who is literal, fact oriented, and has a tight circle of close friends. Prefers to follow social norms; very traditional and guided by the "stay on an even keel" hormone, serotonin.

Negotiator : A people person with strong verbal skills, very intuitive and great at reading gestures and tone of voice. Very imaginative and can easily see the big picture. Compassionate and nurturing personality fueled by the "female" hormone, estrogen.

Director : Direct, decisive, and analytical personality fueled by the "guy" hormone, testosterone. Good with computers, all things mechanical, understands the architectural structure of a building or piece of music.

Unfortunately, Fisher isn't ready to reveal to me the specifics of, say, whether an explorer attracts or repels a builder. "My publisher will kill me if I give too much away," she confides—though I'm guessing that making vacation plans might be tricky for those two.

There's certainly no shortage of research on how we select our matches. Studies suggest that opposites don't usually attract, that most people feel chemistry with strangers from the same sort of family, religious, and economic backgrounds who have a similar amount of physical attractiveness and intelligence and who share core values. Researchers from Durham University in England found that women view men with masculine faces (square jaw, larger nose, smaller eyes) as good for hookups but bad for long-term partners as they're likely to be less faithful and worse parents compared with men with feminine facial features (fuller lips, wide eyes, thinner eyebrows). The same researchers reported last week that men and women reacting to physical appearance are attracted to complete opposites: The guys went for photos of females who had reported on an earlier survey being open to short-term sexual relationships (unbeknownst to the men), whereas the women were most drawn to guys who preferred long-term relationships. The sexes are more in tune when it comes to a sense of humor, according to Canadian researchers. Women want a man who makes them laugh—and men want a woman who laughs at their jokes.

Regardless of what triggers that spark, Fisher tells me there are certain truths about its power:

• If we can't get the one we want, we may develop "frustration attraction" that causes us to want that person more.

• Romantic love is paramount: 91 percent of women and 86 percent of men reported in a recent survey that it's not enough to love a person to choose marriage. It's necessary to be "in love." (Another poll found that 47 percent of folks said they would divorce after two years if they weren't still in love, but only 16 percent would if they already had a child from the marriage. So kids can trump romance.)

• It's possible to still be "in love" after a decade or more of marriage. Fisher did a brain scan on a friend of hers who said he was still in love with his wife after 25 years and found increased activity in three areas of the brain associated with the early stages of love. "It's certainly possible but you've got to pick the right person and you have work to sustain it," she says. Besides doing things for each other and treating each other with respect, she says couples have to do novel things to drive up dopamine in the brain. Couples skydiving, perhaps?

Taking Depression to Heart

Physical symptoms of the mood disorder are linked to thickening arteries
By Karen Pallarito
FRIDAY, Aug. 1 (HealthDay News) -- Scientists have long observed a link between depression and heart disease. Now there's research to help pinpoint the symptoms of depression that may signal cardiovascular trouble.

A study suggests that people who suffer from depression, especially certain physical symptoms such as loss of appetite, sleep problems or fatigue, may be at risk of developing heart disease.
"Our findings raise the possibility that the physical symptoms of depression are particularly toxic to the cardiovascular system," said the study's lead author, Jesse C. Stewart, assistant professor in the Department of Psychology at Indiana University-Purdue University, Indianapolis. "Identifying the most harmful aspect of depression is important, because we will then know which specific components to target with our treatments."
Previous studies have linked negative emotions, including depression, anxiety and anger, to a heightened risk of heart disease. But because these emotions tend to overlap and "co-occur" within people, it's been difficult to associate a particular symptom -- or set of symptoms -- with heightened cardiovascular risk, Stewart explained.
His study, published in the Archives of Internal Medicine, is believed to be the first to tease out which emotions are key risk factors for heart disease.
"Our study is important, because it is the first to simultaneously examine the links between all of these negative emotions and sub-clinical atherosclerosis," Stewart said. "In addition, we broke depression down into physical and cognitive/emotion symptom clusters, which is uncommon."
Stewart's team measured the internal carotid artery thickness of 324 adults at the beginning of the study and three years later.
Thickening of the inside walls of the coronary arteries -- atherosclerosis -- slows or blocks the flow of blood to the heart and brain and can lead to heart attack or stroke. The carotid artery is the large vessel in the neck that supplies blood to the brain.
The study found that depressive symptoms, but not anxiety and anger, were associated with greater thickening of the arteries over time. Further analyses indicated that only the physical symptoms of depression were associated with thickening arteries, while the cognitive and emotional symptoms of depression, such as sadness, pessimism, and indecisiveness, were not related.
Scientists have not yet established whether depression causes heart disease or whether some other factor, such as diet, affects depression and heart disease. In a review of the epidemiologic data, published in 2007, Dr. Francois Lesperance, a professor in the Department of Psychiatry at the University of Montreal in Canada, noted that the evidence supports each theory.
While it might be useful to identify depression as a marker for future heart trouble, it's still not a proven tool. "No secondary prevention trial has successfully reduced cardiovascular risk by targeting depression," Lesperance wrote.
Robert M. Carney, a professor of psychiatry and director or the Behavioral Medicine Center at Washington University School of Medicine in St. Louis, agreed. "There currently exists no evidence that treating depression will help prevent heart disease," he said. "The biggest reason is that studies that would be needed to draw that conclusion would have to be large and therefore very expensive."
Still, Carney thinks it's important for patients to know that depression is a risk factor for developing heart disease. What's more, the potential benefits of recognizing and treating depression, such as improved quality of life, are well known and sufficient reason to get treatment, he noted. "Hopefully, an added bonus will be to reduce the risk of developing or suffering from heart disease," he said.
Stewart is planning other studies examining the relationships between depression and hostility, and various measures of cardiovascular risk. He also plans to investigate whether positive emotions -- happiness, for example -- and related factors, such as optimism, are associated with reduced cardiovascular risk and therefore protective against heart disease.

"Ultimately, we plan to use the data from this study and similar investigations to develop a psychological treatment for adults at risk for cardiovascular disease," Stewart said. "We hope that our treatment, when combined with standard treatments, will help to prevent the development of cardiovascular disease."

Confronting Sadness in Seniors

By Matthew Shulman

A bit of sadness is a common companion of aging. Over time, after all, seniors may lose vigor, independence, and even loved ones. But when melancholy becomes outright depression, the elderly are at risk of diabetes, heart disease, and even suicide. It's often up to their unofficial caretakers—their children—to spot depression's signs and take steps to address it.

Depression often manifests differently in the elderly than in younger people. Rather than expressing feelings of sadness, depressed seniors may describe physical complaints—increased aches and pains, headaches, weakness, and, commonly, trouble sleeping. "Look for changes in levels of interest, too," says Dan Blazer, professor of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Duke University Medical Center. Increases in anxiety, irritability, withdrawal, and a decrease in attention to appearance are also common signs. Sometimes, depression arises because of a physical health problem, says Gary Moak, president of the American Association for Geriatric Psychiatry and a professor at the University of Massachusetts Medical School. For example, he says, "as many as 40 percent of stroke victims will develop depression, because many [strokes] occur in an area of the brain that's closely related to the processing and management of emotions." Overall, about 1 in 5 people age 65 and older has depression, according to Moak. The vast majority don't receive the professional treatment they need.

Untreated depression can lead to needless pain and distress. For one thing, seniors commit 20 percent of all suicides, while representing only 13 percent of the population. Depression also "amplifies" common age-related diseases such as heart disease and diabetes, says Charles Reynolds, a professor of geriatric psychiatry at the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center. It can also weaken immunity and worsen arthritis and Parkinson's disease.

Solutions for late-life depression run the gamut from medication to talk therapy to closer engagement with friends and family. All should be considered, experts say. Reynolds's research shows that long-term antidepressant use can reduce the recurrence of depressive episodes by 60 percent over two years. In the most severe cases, a combination of medication and psychotherapy is more effective than either alone, says Elise Beaulieu, a geriatric social worker with Boston University.

Social support from family and friends is among the keys to recovery. For seniors who are isolated, forming new networks outside the family—through a senior center, say, or a volunteer job—can have a positive influence. For Randal Perkins, that meant moving his 69-year-old mother from Florida, where she'd developed depression, to Pittsburgh so she could live with family. She now receives medication and psychotherapy, and Perkins also takes a personal role in sustaining her mood. Taking her to church functions, to visit family, and to the local library can "lift her spirits," he says. "She smiles more, interacts more with people, has more conversation, and in the end will tell you, 'I'm glad I made the effort.' "

Is Your Job Killing You? How Work Influences Longevity

What you do at work may be a lot more important to your health than you realize
By Katherine Hobson

In an attempt to live longer and protect against health problems, you may have given up trans fats, started to monitor your cholesterol, or learned to work the elliptical trainer at the gym. But there's increasing evidence that another factor may be just as important: your job. A constellation of work-related factors—whether you're employed, how secure you are in your job, how much you enjoy your work—may influence both your day-to-day health and how long you live. And that has serious implications, not only for those affected by the current recession, but for everyone, all the time. "We spend 8, 10, 12 hours a day at work," says William Gallo, a research scientist at the Yale School of Public Health. "That may be more important than whether you're on the Zone Diet."

Our work is intricately tied up with our well being, says Nortin Hadler, a professor of medicine and microbiology and immunology at the University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill and an attending rheumatologist at that university's hospitals. And we know that losing a job is bad for your health, not only from a financial perspective but from a psychosocial one, too. When you lose your job, you lose social ties and, often, the very structure of your life. After a major downsizing among municipal workers in Finland, the risk of death from a heart attack went up fivefold for those who lost their jobs. It's unclear whether the same mortality trends seen in Europe persist here; studies are ongoing. Gallo says evidence in the United States has been mixed, but research has found that people who lost a job in their 50s were more than twice as likely to have a heart attack or stroke in the next decade.

It's not just those who lose their jobs who are at risk of serious health problems or premature death. In Finland, even those municipal workers who weren't actually downsized were more likely to die sooner, says Hadler. In the United Kingdom, the "Whitehall studies" included a glimpse of a group of civil service workers whose jobs were threatened by a planned Thatcher-era privatization. The research found declines in both physical and mental health after the announcement, says Sir Michael Marmot, professor of epidemiology and public health at University College London and the principal investigator for the studies. Research in the United States led by Sarah Burgard, a sociologist at the University of Michigan's Institute for Social Research, has shown that job insecurity can be as bad for your longer-term health as a bout with a serious illness or even an actual job loss.

Underlying all of this is the fact that a person's socioeconomic position—of which employment is a key part—is associated with differences in longevity, regardless of the economic climate, says Marmot. The Whitehall studies revealed that many causes of death follow a "social gradient"; the higher up on the ladder, the longer your life. It's not that people lower down are dying of any specific ailment. The diseases are generally the same, but the timing is different, Marmot says.

The pecking order. It's pretty clear that something about the workplace pecking order affects health. One factor seems to be how much control employees have over the demands associated with their respective jobs. "Pressure by itself wasn't a key factor," says Marmot. "It's a combination of high demands and low control." That combination—often found in lower-ranking, lower-paying jobs—is associated with an earlier death, and also with cardiovascular disease, mental health problems, sleep issues, and among other maladies, says Benjamin Amick III, a professor of behavioral sciences and epidemiology at the University of Texas Health Science Center's School of Public Health. His recent research suggests that people who work in jobs with low demands are also at risk if they have low control over their work. "If you spend your working life in a job that's basically boring, you're at risk of dying sooner," Amick says.

You might think this comes down to money and access: If you can't afford to buy healthcare, you're likely to be less healthy. But studies show the same trends even in countries where free healthcare is available to all. That means simply ensuring access to care isn't likely to solve the problem. (Though in a country like the United States, where so many lack insurance and the gap is so big, it's an essential step, researchers say.) It's true that some of the difference in the Whitehall studies can be explained by the fact that people lower down the totem pole were more likely to smoke, less likely to be physically active in their leisure time, and less likely to eat fruits and vegetables, says Marmot. Those public health messages are heard but simply aren't being acted on—and we need to learn why, he says.

But if access to care and lifestyle habits can't account for all the early deaths, what's going on? Researchers suspect constant stress is a culprit. Studies of some of our closer animal relatives, baboons, show that both low-ranking animals and those that are socially isolated have higher levels of stress hormones like cortisol. While humans are not baboons, Marmot suspects the same biological mechanisms are at work in the civil servants he studies; constant stress both on and off the job may be contributing to ill health.

Health disparities aren't likely to go away, but the gaps can be narrowed. At a policy level, that suggests a need for broad changes, Burgard says. It would involve getting the unemployed—who are most at risk of health declines—back in the workplace quickly, and, yes, making sure everyone has access to health insurance. That's particularly important for older workers, she says. Social programs can help, says Eunice Rodriguez, an associate professor at the Stanford School of Medicine who studies the impact of such programs on health. "The bottom line is to provide strong unemployment insurance in a way that people can have a feeling of security when looking for a job," she says. Welfare doesn't seem to provide the same protection, perhaps in part because of the stigma involved, Rodriguez adds.

What to do. Individuals can protect themselves by trying to find a job with a positive work environment and being smart about health insurance, says Amick, though he acknowledges that it's tough to do that in the current economy. But when and if you have some leeway in employment or a choice of managers, take your work conditions seriously—don't write them off as "just a job." If you're unemployed or not happy at work, try to stay on a good track with a healthy lifestyle—exercise is particularly helpful for relieving stress and maintaining general physical and mental health, says Burgard. And stress relief can help, too. (Here's some advice on how to manage your stress and even make it work for you.) On the flip side, don't think that because you do have a good job you're free to abuse your body; a study published this week found that affluence provides no protection from the ill effects of tobacco.

Beyond individual behavior, society needs to take as hard a look at helping people pursue nurturing, gainful employment as it has at new drugs and the latest diet trend, says Hadler. "It's important to be comfortable in your own skin," he says. "People need to feel valuable."

Why Loneliness Is Bad for Your Health

A conversation with John Cacioppo, author of a new book on the need for social connection
By Nancy Shute

When all is said and done, the best guarantee of a long and healthy life may be the connections you have with other people. John Cacioppo, a neuroscientist at the University of Chicago and coauthor of a new book, Loneliness: Human Nature and the Need for Social Connection (W. W. Norton, $25.95), talked with U.S. News about the latest research on how relationships affect physical health. Edited excerpts:

Why did you choose to study loneliness?
We want to understand what importance our social connections have to people's biology. Early in human history, our species's survival required the protection of families and tribes. Isolation meant death. The painful feeling known as loneliness is a prompt to reconnect to others.

You say that social isolation has an impact on health comparable to high blood pressure, obesity, lack of exercise, or smoking. Can you explain?
Loneliness shows up in measurements of stress hormones, immune function, and cardiovascular function. Lonely adults consume more alcohol and get less exercise than those who are not lonely. Their diet is higher in fat, their sleep is less efficient, and they report more daytime fatigue. Loneliness also disrupts the regulation of cellular processes deep within the body, predisposing us to premature aging.

You point out that, oddly enough, loneliness also makes us less socially adept. How?
Lonely adults have the same social skills as nonlonely adults, but they don't deploy them as appropriately. We think that lonely individuals feel threatened, and because of that feeling of threat, they're not certain they can trust others. When you see something positive happening to others, you're not sure if you're included, so you're aloof, demanding, or critical.

Is the solution to surround ourselves with people?
Loneliness isn't necessarily a result of being alone. Think about a bereaved spouse and the college freshman going away from home for the first time. They can be around a lot of people but feel completely isolated. In humans, perceived isolation is so much more important than physical isolation.

How can each of us manage our own feelings of loneliness?
Just like hunger and thirst and pain, loneliness signals something important for the survival of your genes—the need for connection to other individuals. A loneliness response might tell you to pass up that promotion that requires that you rip yourself away from friends and family and move to another country. Or if you do move, you'll know you have to say, OK, I will set up a system to maintain and restore those relationships.

In everyday life, play with the idea of trying to get small doses of the positive sensations that come from good social interactions. Just saying to someone, "Isn't it a beautiful day?" or "I loved that book!" can bring a friendly response that makes you feel better.

When it comes to friendships, some people think that in order to be less lonely, everybody has to like them. That's not true. It takes just one, two, or three people. The person who has 4,000 friends on Facebook is not necessarily the least lonely person, especially if he spends all his time maintaining his Facebook page.

I'm glad you brought up Facebook. Can virtual connections give us what we need?
It really depends how one uses them. People have thought of them as being all good or all bad, but it's more subtle than that. If you use artificial means of connecting as a substitute for physical means of connection, you actually get lonelier. However, if you are disabled and isolated by virtue of the disability and the Internet is permitting you to make connections, then it decreases feelings of isolation.

You say we connect with others in three basic ways, but each person has his or her own comfort level with those connections. How does that work?
Humans have a need to be affirmed up close and personal; we see this most often in marriage. But people who don't marry may find meaning elsewhere. We also have a need for a wider circle of friends and family, but we all know that close family connections can be a mixed blessing. And there's a need to feel that we belong to a larger group. Many of us tend to ignore the collective part of social connection until there is an insult or threat. An example is how, right after 9/11, Americans felt very close to one another. There was a harmony and helpfulness that was really quite surprising. Being an Obama-ite during the campaign would be another example of having a collective identity, feeling like you're part of something grand and wonderful.

People who go to church regularly live longer than nonchurchgoers. Why is that?
Churches can be very beneficial—one can feel connected to the group, the church, and to God. Those are actually different things, but both seem to have beneficial effect. God is like a supercharged friend.

You joke about how men soothe their loneliness with computers and women do it with pets. But there is indeed a difference.
We do see a distinction between men and women. Men don't understand their wives' need for girlfriends. On the other hand, as the wife walks out the door to have lunch with her friends, the husband might be watching the football game on TV all by himself. If she asks if he's lonely, he'd say, "No, I'm with my tribe. Go, Bears!"