Acupuncture 101

Acupuncture 101 10 frequently asked questions about this popular alternative health treatment.

By Paul Kempisty, NCCAOM-certified acupuncturist, as interviewed by Lilit Marcus

You may have heard celebrities or TV personalities talk about how acupuncture soothed their chronic pain or helped them quit smoking, but there's a lot more to this ancient technique. Whether you're a longtime fan of alternative medicine or just looking to expand your current treatment regimen, this article will help you to learn about acupuncture, how it works, and what benefits it might have for you.

1. What conditions or illnesses can acupuncture treat?

Acupuncture 101 Nausea, headaches, lower-back pain, and other chronic illnesses are proven by medical studies to be alleviated by acupuncture. Devotees of acupuncture say that it can also help with everything from stress to weight loss, from infertility to blood pressure to breaking habits like smoking. Acupuncture is a kind of holistic medicine, meaning it treats the mind, body, and soul as one. Therefore, almost any condition can be aided by acupuncture.

2. Exactly how does acupuncture work?

Acupuncture 101 The vocabulary of Chinese medicine is based on the metaphors used to describe the natural world. Throughout our bodies, we have systems of "meridians" that are mapped out via specific acupuncture points. These points are the powerful areas that stimulate various functions in the body. Acupuncture points each have names, including Hidden Valleys, Gushing Streams, Kunlun Mountains, and Source Receptacles. When you put a needle in a point, you stimulate the functions of that point. You either bring energy to that point or you remove energy from it.

The meridians are also connected to the organs or the body. Your organs are like roadways or canal systems, and they either need more traffic or less at any given time. They need resources to be distributed in a certain way, and the points do that.

3. How do I choose an acupuncturist if I've never been to one before?

Acupuncture 101 If your insurance company covers acupuncture, you should check out their approved list of practitioners. However, if you're choosing one randomly, make sure that the acupuncturist is licensed by NCCAOM (National Certification Commission for Acupuncture and Oriental Medicine). They have lists you can reference by geographic area on their www.nccaom.org. You may also want to ask a friend for a recommendation.

4. What kinds of things should I be ready to discuss at my first acupuncture appointment?

Acupuncture 101 Whatever your chief complaint is, bring that up. If an acupuncturist is knowledgeable in Western medicine, he or she might want to talk about the treatments you've already done, or discuss the medical options you have. The acupuncturist will also lay out how the Chinese medicine philosophy applies to that particular ailment. Then the acupuncturist should ask questions that help refine a diagnosis in terms of Chinese medicine. The basic questions are things like: "You have a headache; what makes it better, what makes it worse?", "Where is the pain located?", or "What is the nature of the pain?"

The practitioner's questions elicit information on which organs are overactive, which meridians are underactive, which is the weak link in the chain, and which is compensating. That helps us choose acupuncture points which will treat that condition.

5. Do the needles hurt?

Acupuncture 101 No, if the acupuncturist is skilled, the needles really do not hurt. You feel something, a small sensation, but it's not like the type of needling that you experience when you give blood. Acupuncture needles are so thin, you can fit anywhere from five to ten of them inside the hollow of a hypodermic needle.

Some acupuncturists might do a really light manipulation of a needle so that a person feels it, but only so as to bring their awareness and energy to that point. If there's a blockage in the point and you want to disburse the energy, then you might do a little bit of a stronger stimulation, which could feel a bit uncomfortable for the patient, but only because it is moving their awareness throughout their body. There are some points, ones where pain is located, that we know that tend to be sensitive, and so we might tell a person to take a breath or say, "This point is a little bit strong, so be prepared."

6. How long does a session last, and what does it entail?

Acupuncture 101 Typically, the total time is 75-90 minutes for the initial appointment, and an hour for appointments after that. In a typical session, my patients change into a gown. Then I take a detailed look at their tongue and take their pulse. I list any diet and lifestyle recommendations that are pertinent, discuss with them the treatment options and recommendations, and set their plan. It takes about 10 minutes for the needles to find their points, and then the needles are left in place for 20 to 30 minutes in most cases. I will often check in at least once with the patient during this resting time. After I remove the needles, I leave to allow the patient to gather themselves and get dressed. Then I answer any final questions and explain any interesting things that they experienced.

7. Why do you put needles on parts of my body other than the ones that hurt?

Acupuncture 101 Chinese medicine is called a Medicine of Systematic Correspondences. Every organ has a flavor, a color, an emotion, a time of day, a time of year, and a body fluid that's associated with it. When you draw this web, it's an extraordinarily complicated mesh of interconnections. In the concept of systematic correspondences, the ear, for example, has related points that cover the whole body. The nose has a micro-system. The hands and the feet all have micro-systems. The elbow joint corresponds to the knee joint. So, if you have a very active painful condition in your elbow, a first-time treatment might actually not needle the elbow directly because it might be too inflamed. An acupuncturist might choose the opposite elbow or the opposite knee as a corresponding point to open up that particular type of energy in the body. Sometimes if a person has low abdominal pain, you can needle on the chest and close to the neck, which can be really helpful.

8. How long does it take for the average person to start noticing improvement on acute conditions?

Acupuncture 101 It depends. Some people are wonderful responders. They respond quickly, immediately, and completely. For some people, after one or two treatments the person is 90-100 percent better. Most people are more in the middle. Depending on their condition, the intensity, how deep the problem is in their system, and how long they've had it, they have different responses. I give them a treatment, and they feel a little bit better. I add another treatment, and they feel a little bit better. Usually it takes two or three sessions to figure out their degree of response, but once I have that, I can usually chart a pretty clear line of expectation for when they will feel better.

9. How often should a person get treated for a chronic condition?

Acupuncture 101 It depends on the condition. When patients first comes in, they might come once a week or once every two weeks. Say they have a back pain, and they've had it for while. They might come once every one or two weeks for a number of sessions until they're stabilized and feel considerably better. After that they might come in for maintenance on a periodic basis. But if their back is feeling a bit achy and they're feeling like it's going to go out again, they might come in for a couple of "tune-up" sessions.

10. What else should people know about acupuncture?

Acupuncture 101 Acupuncture is a medical system, not a magic bullet. It can make a person feel well, but if he or she keeps eating McDonald's three times a day, those problems or illnesses will persist or come back. Acupuncture is about whole-body health, and people have to be willing to make other changes in their lives in order to be healthy.

The truly mind-blowing positive potential, however, is something that I notice in the first few sessions I give to a patient. It might happen the first time, or might take a few visits, but the actual treatment time appears to be a gateway for people to enter very deep and often previously unexplored levels of consciousness within themselves. For some people the experiences seem to last only for the duration of the session, while for others the connection lingers. But whenever it happens, it opens that person up to a whole new and tangible part of themselves. This is an amazing thing.

Aging Body, Ageless Soul

When it comes to getting older, we have a choice: cling to the past (and suffer), or let go and enjoy the spiritual journey.

To our egos, change is scary. "The kids have grown up." "My friends have started dying." "My body seems to have a lot more fat on it." "I'm forgetting things lately." What we're sensing is our lack of control over our universe at that moment, and if our identities are based on identification with all the stuff around us, then a threat to any of it is a threat to our existence, and so change becomes something to avoid at all cost. And yet change is inevitable. Interesting predicament.

It turns out that the solution to the problem of change is yet another change. But what we're changing this time is who we see ourselves to be. That is, we don't have to go on clinging to the past, buying into a cultural myth of The Youthful Me, hanging on to who we used to be. We don't have to go on identifying ourselves with that being who's changing, seeing the aging process through those eyes. If we can just quiet down and look a little more deeply, we see that right behind the identity that's so caught in the story line there is... someone else. Just behind all that drama is a place of mindfulness, a place of the witness. It is a part of us that is purely equanimous, that's just watching the whole story unfold. That's what I'll call the soul.

There are three consciousness planes we can inhabit—three perspectives, we could call them—from which we can view our situation. As Number One, we are our egos—our bodies, our personalities, our every-day selves. As Number Two, we are our astral selves, what I've called our souls. And as Number Three, we are—well, let's not give it a name, because wars have been fought over what to call the Nameless. So for the moment, let's just call it Number Three.

When it comes to aging, we have a choice about where we're going to position ourselves, as we watch the phenomena that getting older entails. We can look at them from the ego's point of view, from Number One, and get all lost in our clingings, and our fears, and our dramas. Or we can flip the channel and look at those same events from the soul's point of view. We'll find that everything changes with that shift in perspective. The situation itself doesn't change, mind you, but our experience of it becomes a whole different thing. The soul won't be busy getting lost in all the "stuff" the way the ego is—the soul is just appreciating the incarnation, appreciating the unfolding of it all.

As changes happen—sure, certain doors will close to us; but at the same time, the changes will open the opportunities and challenges of new roles. Which new roles we then choose to manifest will be decided by our appreciation of all the forces acting upon our lives, but there will certainly be new role opportunities that will arise for each of us as we get older.

But that's just the surface. There's also a much more interesting game going on here. Looking at our lives from the soul-perspective doesn't just give us a more effective way of fulfilling our roles—it takes us outside of our roles. The soul-view gives us a look at our lives from the outside, and that puts a different light on things.

If, for example, we have been on a high diet of achievement gratification—whether it's been raising children, or holding a job, or whatever ways our egos have used to keep negating their sense of inadequacy—when that feeding of "proof of accomplishment" is no longer available, there is a rising sense of failure that stems from our lurking inadequacy for which we don't have an immediate fix. Suffering. But from a soul-view—achievement, non-achievement, no difference; adequacy, inadequacy, all the same.

When our bodies start to decay, when they start to fail us, it can often send us into despair or depression, into ever thicker ego states, unless we remain mindful. Let me give you an extreme example of that.

Before my stroke, I used to work a lot with dying people. It's part of what I've always loved to do, because it seems to me the richest broth of spirit I can consume on this plane. Someone who's dying has very little to lose, so you have opportunities for moments of real truth with another human being, and that's very, very rare.

I was visiting once with a fellow who was in the last stages of ALS—Lou Gehrig's disease, the illness causes the muscles to seize up and stop working one by one. When I visited him he had just two functioning muscles left: he could pucker his lips for a dot, in Morse Code, and raise his eyebrows for a dash. Those were the only movements left in his body.

When I walked into that room, the first thing I felt was the most extraordinary claustrophobia in myself; the idea of being trapped inside a body where those were the only movements left to me was terrifying. But I realized that if I stayed in that place, all I would be offering him was reinforcement for the pain he already had at being in that situation.

So I reached in my pocket for my mala—the prayer beads I always carry—and I started chanting my mantra: "Ram, Ram, Ram, Ram, Ram." And because I have worked with that mantra for a long time, and invested it, it quieted me down, it helped me center. Slowly, my reactivity settled down, and I realized that I'd forgotten once again—that once again I'd gotten sucked in by the incredible intensity of a human story line. And I came back to being a soul, who is in a birth, in which I am sitting next to somebody who's also a soul in a birth, a birth in which he now has ALS.

Then he and I talked back and forth—I mean, I talked, and he did his Morse Code—about what the incarnation was like. We were looking into each other's eyes, and after a while the space got quieter and quieter, until pretty soon we were just sitting there appreciating it all together—the total tapestry of a human life, with all its beauty and all its suffering. The whole room started to take on this purple glow, and he was radiant. He spelled out to me, "Much light, much light."

For me, it was as if we had met in a space behind the dance, the dance of being "someone dying of ALS" and of being "someone there to help somebody dying of ALS." We met as fellow souls. "You in there? I'm in here. Wow, what a trip you're on!" Think about meeting another human being that way. It's so rare for us, we call it "soul mates" when it happens. But ultimately the game is to be there for everybody as a soul, if they're ready to come out and play. And if they want to stay egos, that's fine too—I can still be a soul, no matter who they want to be.

It turns out that the whole journey of aging is something designed to lead us from thinking of ourselves as egos to knowing ourselves as souls. We're given opportunity after opportunity to practice letting go and to shift our perspective from ego to soul-view. However if aging doesn't do it for us, then the next stage, dying, certainly will. Because at death the ego ceases; the soul, on the other hand, goes on. The soul doesn't age the way the body ages, so aging and dying are trips of the ego and of the physical manifestation. The soul is merely watching: birth, existence, aging, death. In India they talk about dying as "dropping the body." Different image, right? "I'm dropping my body. See ya! Yep, selling the Ford."

Of course, there are people you love deeply. And some of them are going to die before you do. And you're going to grieve like hell; it will be fierce suffering, because you were in the habit of having that unique form of spirit there with you, and you're clinging to that. But after awhile, if you don't suppress your grief and if you allow yourself to go all the way through the process, you will come to a quiet moment when you can listen to your heart. And then you'll recognize that, because you have connected with that being in even a moment of love, the essence of that person is still there. You'll suddenly realize that you'd been so busy mourning what had died that you'd ignored what hadn't. At that moment, grief is turned into something else—it's turned into an incredible joy of intimacy.

As it becomes clearer and clearer that there are advantages to adopting a soul-perspective as part of our agenda for aging, the question becomes how to do it, and the process of discovering the answer to that question is the spiritual quest for each of us. There's no one-size-fits-all on the spiritual path. I think we have to look at what's presented to us, listen to our hearts, and go with whatever practices feel right.

There are, however, some things that are often helpful. It's useful, for example, to have something around that awakens our faith—a picture, a rock, a card with a sacred quote written on it. Many of us find it helpful to have some form of meditation or mantra or prayer we can repeat, whether it's one of the names of God, or a sacred word, or a phrase. That kind of practice can remind us, quiet us, help carry us through the moments when the changes are coming hot and heavy—the way that "Ram" chant did for me.

Practices that help us become comfortable with the transitory nature of phenomena prepare us for the times when we're confronted by unexpected changes. There is a Tibetan stanza that's a great spiritual practice condensed into five lines. It reads:

Prolong not the past,
Invite not the future.
Alter not your innate wakefulness
Don't fear appearances.
There is nothing more than that.
You can work with those lines—they can be a whole practice for you: Let it all go. Past? Future? Just dream-stuff. Don't let it disturb your "innate wakefulness," your soul-view.

I find it helpful, in carrying out this curriculum of aging, to restructure my life so that my time is not quite so filled with activities. It gives me more opportunity to remember that I'm a soul. If I stay locked too tightly into chronological or physical time, time itself tends to seduce me into ego-view. So I let go of my busy-ness. I spend some time just looking out the window, say, or watching the flow of a stream; I slowly let myself into a different time scale, and that helps me open into the soul-perspective.

And if I go further still, if I leave the soul-view and enter into pure Awareness, it is timeless. There was a beautiful, spiritual woman, a great Indian saint named Anandamayi Ma. Millions of people came to be in her presence, because it felt so spacious and unconditional and loving. At one point, Paramahansa Yogananda said to her, "Ma, who are you?" She replied, "Father, there is little to tell. My consciousness has never associated itself with this temporary body. Before I came on this earth, Father, I was the same. I grew into womanhood, but still I was the same. When the family in which I had been born made arrangements to have this body married, I was the same. And Father, in front of you now, I am the same. Even afterwards, though the dance of creation changes around me in the hall of eternity, I shall be the same."

Imagine recognizing that in yourself—and then living your life. Just imagine: resting in no-time, and dancing in time. That's what's available to us—it's who we can be. It's who we are, it's right here; we just have to add in that other part of our consciousness, the part that is watching the whole show unfold. That will color and change everything.

A human life is an experiment in planes of consciousness. Incarnation tests our ability to remember who we are, to remember that we're also souls and that we don't have to get so caught up in the story line we're living out. We can be open to all of it—including growing old, suffering, death, everything. The game, as I see it, is ultimately to become one with Awareness—to just be, without any defining boundaries, without any conceptual structures. And the conceptual structure that's hardest to shed is the "I"—meaning "somebody separate from everything else."

The age-stage is a time when the ego faces a gradual erosion of its boundaries, of its image that "this is who I am." The soul looks to the age-stage as coincidental with a process in which the soul itself is dissolving its own boundaries, and expanding into its own greater identity as pure spirit. And death? A moment when the veils part, the ego falls away, and the soul lets go of all the encrusted layers of identity, with a sigh of relief.

What I understand from Eastern traditions is that if, at the moment of death, I am identified exclusively with ego, I am likely to be overwhelmed by my fear of the cessation of my own existence as a separate being. Because the ego will, in fact, die. If, however, I have developed some soul-perspective, I will have a better chance of remaining quietly conscious through it all, just observing: watching my ego dissolving, watching the body dropping away. At that point, whatever in me that is left uncooked will steer me towards my next incarnation in order to continue my karmic work. When the seeds are all cooked and my karmic work is complete, my identity at the moment of death will be solely with Number Three. So when my soul-karma is indeed totally finished, then life and death and ego and soul will all appear like bubbles of phenomena arising out of timeless Awareness, only to dissolve back into Awareness again. And through it all, I shall be the same.

15 Hidden Health Secrets of Lemons

Did you know the Ancient Egyptians believed that eating lemons and drinking lemon juice was an effective protection against a variety of poisons, and that recent research has confirmed this belief?

There are many health benefits of lemons that have been known for centuries. The two biggest are lemons’ strong antibacterial, antiviral, and immune-boosting powers and their use as a weight loss aid because lemon juice is a digestive aid and liver cleanser. Lemons contain many substances--notably citric acid, calcium, magnesium, vitamin C, bioflavonoids, pectin, and limonene--that promote immunity and fight infection.

These are well-known health facts about lemons. But there’s so much more to this little yellow fruit. Here are 15 that I’ll bet you didn’t know. Whether you use them in the form of juice, teas, drinks, dressing, poultices or in the bath, take advantage of lemons’ natural healing power.

Abolish Acne

Lemon contains citric acid, which can be effective in treating acne. The vitamin C found in citrus fruits is vital for that healthy glowing s

kin while its alkaline nature kills some types of bacteria known to cause acne. In addition to drinking lemon juice with water first thing in the morning, here are some suggestions on how to prepare a homemade acne treatment using lemon:

· With your finger or a cotton ball, apply fresh lemon juice on acne and leave it overnight. Wash with water the following morning. There may be an uncomfortable sensation of burning at first, but it will soon disappear.

· Mix one part of freshly squeezed lemon juice with an equal part of rose or honey water. Put the mixture on affected areas for at least half an hour. Wash it afterwards with water. This application should be repeated twice daily, ideally in the morning and the evening.

Note: these remedies are safe and natural, but if acne is severe or there are open wounds, consult your doctor first.

Abandon Your Anxiety

Research has shown that lemon balm has a calming effect and therefore may be able to help remove fatigue, exhaustion, dizziness, anxiety, nervousness, and tension. It is also believed that inhaling lemon oil helps in increasing concentration and alertness. It can therefore be used as a room freshener in offices to increase the efficiency of the employees. If you’re feeling tense sprinkle a few drops of lemon balm essential oil (Melissa officinalis) on a handkerchief to inhale.

Canker Sore, No More

The proven antibacterial and antiviral properties of lemons can accelerate the healing process in the case of cankers. Mix the juice of freshly squeezed lemon into a glass of lukewarm water and rinse your mouth with this solution; do this three times a day. There may be a burning sensation when the lemon juice comes into contact with the canker, however, the more frequently you use it, the less burning there will be.

Leave the Fever

Chills and fevers may be due to a variety of causes, but the lemon is always a helpful remedy. Here is a method that can ease symptoms: add the juice of 1 lemon to a cup of hot water with honey and drink at once, then every 2 hours until the fever or chill subsides.

Cold and Flu Got You Blue?

When you have a cold, the healing power of lemons works both internally, by supplying urgently required vitamin C to your defense cells, and externally, through the application of its antiviral properties to the virus on the mucous membranes in the nose and throat.

At the first indication of a cold – a runny nose or sore throat –try to give your body as much immune-boosting vitamin C as you can so that the virus is eliminated before it gets a chance to take hold. Drink the freshly squeezed juice of 1 lemon in a glass of lukewarm water every 2 hours.

If you have a sore throat, add the juice of 1 lemon and 1 teaspoon (5ml) of sea salt to 1 cup (250ml) lukewarm water. Gargle three times a day for 1 minute to diminish the burning sensation. If it’s a case of tonsillitis, gargle every 2 hours for at least 30 seconds with the freshly squeezed juice of 1 lemon. Tilt the head back to allow the antibacterial and antiviral properties of the juice to flow into the back of the throat. You can swallow the juice when you have finished gargling thereby benefiting from an immune-boosting vitamin C shot.

Cure Corns and Calluses

Lemon poultices applied overnight are a good home remedy for corns and calluses. Place a slice of lemon approx 5 mm thick on to the corn, bandage and fasten. Dabbing the affected area with lemon essential oil also helps accelerate the healing process. Take care to only use the undiluted oil on the callused area using a cotton ball or Q- tip, as it is too strong for un-callused skin.

Erase Eczema

If you suffer from skin infection such as eczema, a lemon wrap may offer relief. Add 8 drops of lemon essential oil to 1 cup (250ml) lukewarm water and 1 tablespoon (15ml) of liquid honey. Honey also has anti-inflammatory effect and strengthens the healing power of lemon.

Soak a linen cloth in the liquid, squeeze out the excess, and gently place the cloth on the affected area for 15 minutes, 2 to 3 times a day. Not only will this ease the infection, it will counter the overwhelming urge to scratch.

Fight Fatigue

Long distance walkers, world travelers, and explorers look upon the lemon as a Godsend. When fatigue sets in, they might suck lemon juice by piercing the top of the fruit with a straw, giving themselves a quick-acting medicine and a lovely refreshment.

Explorers also use lemon for protection against many infections of the tropics. A small amount of lemon juice will quench thirst more effectively than many times the amount of water. Experienced travelers declare that when they add lemon juice to ordinary drinking water, in various localities, it acts as an antiseptic and prevents illness due to allergy to different water supplies.

Lemon oil also seems to be able to stimulate brain activity so whenever you feel tired for no reason or are finding it hard to focus or concentrate, add 4 drops of lemon oil to a water-filled aromatherapy lamp. Alternatively, drink a glass of lemon water every few hours.

Hexed with Halitosis?

Lemons can help freshen breath that has gone sour after consuming certain spices, alcohol, cigarettes, or that is caused by insufficient salivation. To keep breath fresh, thoroughly rinse your mouth several times a day with the freshly squeezed juice of 1 lemon in a glass of lukewarm water. Chewing on a lemon slice after every meal will also help.

Healing Hypertension

Garlic and onions have been shown to be effective in the fight against hypertension, and they combine well with the healing power of lemon. Add 3 crushed garlic cloves and 1 chopped onion to 1 quart or cold skimmed or low fat milk or soy milk. Slowly bring to the boil and let it stand for 5 minutes. Pour through a sieve and chill. Add the freshly squeezed juice of 3 lemons and sip throughout the day.

And if you suffer from high cholesterol, don’t forget that the pectin power in lemons along with its other metabolism and circulation boosting nutrients can help lower cholesterol.

Smite a Bug Bite

If the stinger is still in the skin, take it out with a pair of tweezers. Massage 1 to 2 drops of lemon oil, mixed with 1 teaspoon of honey, into the skin around the bite.

To repel insects, add 20 drops of lemon oil to 1 cup (250ml) of water and spray into the air. It smells great and repels insects at the same time. Another home remedy is to place a cotton ball soaked in lemon oil in your bedroom. If you are sitting outside in the evening, apply lemon scent to skin areas not covered in clothing. Or, add 10 drops of lemon oil to 1 ½ oz of sunflower oil and rub into the skin.

Put Insomnia to Rest

Several studies have found that lemon balm combined with other calming herbs (such as valerian, hops, and chamomile) helps reduce anxiety and promote sleep. In a recent double-blind, placebo-controlled study, 18 healthy volunteers received two separate single doses of a standardized lemon balm extract (300 mg and 600 mg) or placebo for 7 days. The 600 mg dose of lemon balm increased mood and significantly increased calmness and alertness.

Pulverize Pain

Even though it tastes bitter, lemon juice has a powerful alkaline effect in the body and is therefore a natural agent against excess acid, which is in part responsible for rheumatism. Drink the freshly squeezed juice of 1 lemon in a glass of lukewarm water 3 times a day and if you experience severe pain add the juice of 2 lemons 3 times a day.

Lemon oil has pain-relieving qualities, so to inhibit inflammation and ease pain, massage the affected area daily with several drops of lemon oil mixed with 1 tablespoon (15ml) jojoba oil.

Save your Stomach

Drink the juice of 1 freshly squeezed lemon in a glass of lukewarm water after each meal. The lemon acid will stimulate the production of stomach acid and the activity of stomach muscles.

Say Adios to Varicose

Lemon oil has vessel-strengthening properties that can help fight varicose and spider veins. For spider veins, take 2 to 3 drops of lemon oil every day and mix in a small bowl with jojoba, avocado or almond oil and massage the affected area.

For varicose veins,add 6 drops of lemon oil to 1 ½ oz (50 ml) wheat germ oil, and 2 drops each of cypress and juniper oil. Use this mixture daily for a gentle massage of the legs from bottom to top, in the direction of the heart. For a vein and vessel-rejuvenating bath add 8 drops of lemon oil to a warm bath. Also add 4 drops of cypress oil blended with 1 tablespoon (15ml) of honey. Soak in the bath for 15 minutes and when you come out, pat your skin dry – don’t rub it.

It's Relationships Week on Beyond Blue!

hearts.jpg

Just like last year, I've decided to hold a "Relationships Week" on Beyond Blue because depression affects so many of our relationships and because my articles on relationships always get a good response.

So, in preparation for Valentine's Day on Saturday, here's the line-up this week:

Today

* You Deplete Me: 12 Steps to End a Toxic Relationship
* Quiz: Are You In a Toxic Relationship?

Tuesday

* 12 Ways to Mend a Broken Heart
* Group Beyond Blue: Letting Go of Someone You Thought Loved You

Wednesday

* 12 Ways to Recover from an Emotional Affair
* 10 Signs of an Emotional Affair
* Emotional Affair Support Group

Thursday

* 9 Ways to Affair-Proof Your Marriage
* Video: Date Night
* Rules for Date Night

Friday

* 50 Ways to Keep Your Lover (For Men)
* 50 Ways to Keep Your Lover (For Women)
* Bringing Passion To Your Marriage

10 Ways to Increase Acts of Kindness

Acts of Kindness

Kindness, as well as being a quality of the heart, is a skill. It deepens as we learn to pay attention to ourselves and one another with awareness. When we step out of our comfort zones and experiment with speaking to one another, listening to one another, and caring for one another in a different way, kindness grows. The fruits of greater kindness are revealed in our minds, in our lives, and in our communities. Here are 10 ways to increase your kindness quotient.

Kindness Is a Strength

happiness It is all too easy to consider kindness a secondary virtue, the one we reach for only as a last resort. But if we look at the strength of kindness--the way it reminds us of a sense of inner abundance, the way it helps us feel connected to others instead of isolated and apart--we can appreciate kindness as the force it is. Kindness isn’t an ally of foolishness or gullibility, but rather an ally of wisdom and courage.

Look for the Good in Yourself

happiness All too often we tend to focus on, or even fixate on, the mistakes we’ve made, the times we didn’t speak out because we were too timid, the times we spoke out brusquely or clumsily, and all of our regrets. Looking for the good within isn’t a way to deny our difficulties or problems. Instead, it's a way to broaden our outlook to make it more truthful and rid it of self-criticism. This is a foundation for kindness to ourselves.

Remember What We Share

happiness If we look deeply into any kind of behavior, we will see an urge to feel a part of something greater than our own limited sense of self, a desire to feel at home in this body and mind. This urge toward happiness is often made twisted and distorted by ignorance, not knowing where happiness is actually to be found, and so we do damaging things. But we all share the desire to be happy, a vulnerability to change, to loss, and to fragility. Remembering what we share inspires us toward kindness.

Cultivate Gratitude

happiness Rather than taking inspiring voices for granted, or overlooking the helping hands that might have picked us up when we have fallen, we can make an effort to hold them in our hearts. Sometimes even a small act of kindness on someone’s part makes an essential difference for us. Cultivating gratitude is a way of honoring these people, and also a way of lifting our spirits and reminding us of the power of good-heartedness.

Practice Generosity

happiness, giving The Buddha said, “If you knew as I did, the power of giving, you would not let a single day pass without sharing.” We all have something to give: it may be material, large or small, it may be a smile, or an attentive conversation in the elevator. Perhaps you let a stranger get ahead of you on line, or give a co-worker a small gift, or write a late-night note of appreciation. Any act of generosity--material or of the spirit, small or large--is a meaningful expression of kindness.

Meditate on Kindness

happiness Each day we can take the time to quietly hold others in our hearts and wish them well. Any particular day it might include someone who has been helpful or inspiring to us, someone we know who is feeling alone or afraid, someone who is experiencing triumph and joy, or someone we are about to meet with some trepidation. We might, depending on the circumstances of our lives, particularly include children or animals along with adult people. Taking just 10 minutes a day to reflect in this way is a powerful path to transformation.

Listen to Others Carefully

happiness, listen Often we have conversations where we are only partially paying attention, while at the same time we are thinking about the next email we need to send, or what we forgot to mention to the last person we spoke to. We also commonly make many assumptions about the person we are talking to and no longer fully listen; in effect, we have taken their file, put it in a folder, and filed it away in a drawer. “Oh, they are boring. Their comments in the past were unimpressive.” It is a powerful gesture of kindness, and one that leaves us open to many surprises, to really listen.

Include Those Who Seem Left Out

happiness In a conversation with a group of people, there may be those too shy to speak out unasked. In a room full of partygoers, there may be some who hardly know anyone there. We can probably all remember that awful feeling of wanting to feel a part of a group but instead feeling left out and unseen. At one event I arrived earlier than my friends and ended up approaching a woman standing alone and seeming ill at ease. (In fact she had been dismayed at not knowing anyone there.) We ended up having many common interests and connections--and spent a delightful time together.

Refrain from Speaking Ill

happiness A friend told me about a time he resolved not to talk about any third person; if he had something to say about someone, he would say it to them instead. If you feel tempted to put someone down, assume knowledge of their bad motives, or generally prove their inferiority, take a breath. Even though we might feel a rush of power in saying those words, they can easily come back to haunt us. We ultimately get no benefit from dividing people and sowing seeds of dissension and dislike. There are ways to talk honestly about wrong behavior without derision or condemnation for the person acting.

Empathize with Others

happiness It is always useful to put ourselves in someone else’s place. As the old proverb suggests, “Walk a mile in another person’s shoes before you pass judgment.’” Even if we are going to take strong action to try to change someone’s behavior, a sense of empathy and understanding for them won’t weaken us. If anything, that element of kindness will broaden our avenues of response to a problem, and engender greater creativity as we seek options to ease suffering all around

Angel Sightings

Angel Sightings

Your Photos of Angels

In the past, our readers around the world have shared their encounters with angels through amazing photos. Our readers still see angels in unusual ways and in unusual places, and they continue to share their photos. Our latest photo gallery gathers the best photos of angel sightings to show you the heavenly help that is always around you.

Angel Sightings
Angel Holding the Sun
Angel Sightings
Gentle Gliding
Angel Sightings
Trumpet Call
Angel Sightings
Peek-a-Boo
Angel Sightings
Stormy Center
Angel Sightings
Shining Flame and Orbs
Angel Sightings
Swift Wing
Angel Sightings
Soaring Upwards
Angel Sightings
Cold Front
Angel Sightings
Wing Span
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Angel Sightings
Flying Forward
Angel Sightings
Stenciled in the Sky
Angel Sightings
Smoky Trail
Angel Sightings
Fleeting Glimpse
Angel Sightings
Angel Hovering by the Sun
Angel Sightings
Colorado Cloud
Angel Sightings
Three Angels?